The Squamidian Report – June 16 / 18
 
Issue #838

Including:
From Russ
The Ontarion

Hi All,

The neighbor down the street had gotten a new puppy about 3 years ago. That puppy grew up thinking our dog was her mother and our dog Willow in turn thought Zoe was her pup. It was a year ago last March that we had Willow put down but Zoe still remembers her and in fact comes looking for her. They had been quite remarkable together with Zoe being a rather overly exuberant brown Lab and Willow being the stately motherly type. There was a playfulness and a tenderness between them that had to be seen to be believed. While Zoe is now about 3, she still has the enthusiasm and energy of a pup to the extent that whenever her owner accidentally lets her slip out without a leash attached, she heads straight to our front door where she makes her presence known by banging on the door. We have no problem with letting her in at which point she dashes all around the house looking for Willow. This desire to come visit works out very well for her owner because when she does get loose she can not be caught given the fact that she is still young, full of energy, and any attempt to catch her is seen as a game that only she can win. So, when she gets loose, the easiest way for her person to catch her is to simply say “go get Willow”. No matter what Zoe was being distracted by or how much fun she was having playing 'just try to catch me', she immediately heads to our front door where she sits and waits to be let in. Her person can then connect her leash and Zoe, being a typical Lab with a very short attention span, happily heads home, under control whether she knows it or not.

We are often out on our morning walk when we come across Zoe and her person on their walk. Now a full grown Lab that is determined to come and greet us is not all that easy to hold on to so her person simply lets go of the leash and we brace ourselves for the imminent impact of a big brown projectile that has launched herself at us. The further away she was when launched the better because a longer charge at full speed uses up a small amount of energy, lessening the impact. And some how, at the moment of impact, that dog manages to get her nose smear all over the INSIDE of my glasses. We learned long ago to have our mouths shut tight in order to avoid being deep throated by her. Short of wearing a full face motorcycle helmet (which in fact works great as a way of keeping dog tongue out of our eyes and ears) we usually end up slobbered on and licked but thats ok, thats what dogs are for.

And then there is the pair of crows that come to see us. We used to have Stellar Jays coming all the time but had to discourage them because they make such a mess. They become demanding, bossy, and basically poop all over everything, especially the deck chairs as they perch on them while looking in the windows to spy on us. It got to the point where we felt like we were being held hostage. So, now we just feed the humming birds, and we have lots of them coming to the feeders, and the pair of crows. When the weather was nice way back in May the hummers didn't really bother with the feeders as there was lots of natural food available for them but once June hit and acted more like January, well, the hummers are quite happy to except our contribution to their dietary needs. But getting back to the crows.... this pair seem quite happy to clean up any food scraps we put out for them, and its a great way to get rid of some of those scraps that would turn smelly if they were stuffed into a garbage bag and put into the bin. In the old days we fed those scraps to the dog, now its to the crows.

One of those crows actually needs our help a bit. She (just guessing) has a deformed beak and has trouble eating. The scraps we put out are cut up into very small pieces making it easier for her to pick them up. Once she has picked up some pieces she then drops them into the water tray we have sitting on the deck rail, and from there she picks up the now wet food items and swallows them. I guess that helps them go down easier.

This pair of crows have not been messy, at least so far, and have not been bossy or pushy with us. They ignore the humming birds and the hummers ignore them so everyone is getting along just fine.

doug
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From Russ

This will be short and sweet as I can’t sit for long, due to a chronic back problem.
 
“bump” > (verb) 1 push, throw, or strike  2 move along in a bumpy fashion  3 hit or come against with heavy blows  4 bump off (slang)
“bumpy” > (adj.) having bumps; causing bumps; rough  “There’s a bumpy road ahead”
 
“Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me; I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way. I’ve travelled a long way, and some of the roads weren’t paved.” Will Rogers
And I might add; there have been plenty of bumps, and try as I may, I couldn’t dodge them all! There are many bumps on the road of life, but this time, Lord...you gave me a mountain! (when my wife of 57 years died)
 
Bumped-up can be a good thing (when I was promoted to Sergeant)
Bump up can be a bad thing (every long week-end they bump up the price of gas)
I bumped into an old friend at the supermarket and broke my glasses.
We were stopped for a red light when he bumped into my rear end (I won’t even try to explain that one)
Things that go ‘bump’ in the night (your partner coming home drunk again!)
The hike in the ‘minimum wage’ has caused merchants to ‘bump up’ the cost to consumers. (Thanks, Kathleen)
Why is it, whenever I go to drink while driving...we hit a ‘bump’ and it spills onto my lap? (Distracted driving?)
 
“Where’d you get that ‘bump’ on your head?”
“I ‘bumped’ into a doorway...that wasn’t there”
 
I ‘bumped into’ an ‘old girlfriend’ the other day...gee she’s aged!
 
And finally. Kathleen Wynne was ‘bumped badly’ in the Election, and we congratulate Doug Ford and the PC Party in their majority win.
 
Now, if the US could only ‘bump’ Trump!
 
By Uncle Russ.

PS My doc made an appointment for me to see a “spinal surgeon” in Kitchener next month.  Maybe he/she can do something for this *^#+<@* back of mine!!!

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THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone!
Well, a week has gone by since our new provincial government was elected. Although I’m not sure of what to think of the new Premiere I’m hoping he’ll turn out to be a positive force for Ontario. I’ve heard both good and bad about him and the worst I’ve heard has been that he’s another Donald Trump! I sure as heck hope that’s not true!
It’s hard to believe some of the shenanigans that President Trump is pulling when it comes to treating the allies of the USA fairly. I know that he says he has the best interest of the US citizens at heart but I don’t think he realizes that in hurting Canada he’s going to cause a backlash of problems for his American workers as well! Oh well, only time will tell I guess!
*
I spent the day weeding our front garden and raking up the small branches that had fallen from our Birch tree onto the lawn. I guess the wind was so strong over the past day or two that it’s stripped a lot of the weaker twigs and branches off the tree. It took me a good hour and a half to clean up the mess as well to pull the 5,000 weeds that had infested the small garden we have around the base of the Birch tree. It looks a lot less like a jungle now that it’s been cleaned up! LOL! I also spent the day on Thursday weeding the back gardens as well. We had a Small tree of sorts that overhung the pond out back and it was bare and without any leaves this year so it was time to cut it down and make room for something else to fill the space. Now all Carole has to do is decide what she’d like planted in its place. I’m sure she’ll come up with a nice replacement that will grow to size over the next couple of years. In the meantime, we can see the large lime stone rocks that I built up to act as a water fall when we first built the pond about 10 or so years ago! It’s amazing how quickly the plants grow; it didn’t take long for them to fill in the background around the pond. I’d say that within a year or two they were overshadowing the waterfall I built. That’s ok, since I stopped the waterfall from operating about two years after I first made it. For some reason the rubber membrane underneath the limestone rocks sprung a leak shortly after its inception and rather than dismantle the huge rock falls, we decided to change from the falls to a lovely spout that sprays water about 18” high out of the centre of the pond. It both looks and sounds peaceful when in operation. I have it on a timer so that it starts shortly after nine am and shuts off at 7pm each day. It’s a nice effect and we enjoy just sitting on the patio or swinging on the garden swing and listening to the rippling water. When we first built the pond, we tried having fish in the pond but I found that the water was so dirty from their excrement that it was a huge chore to maintain the clarity of the water. SO, I donated the dozen goldfish to the neighbour of a friend of ours who also had a pond and wanted fish. I haven’t heard for years now if he’s still got the fish but if he does I’m sure they are huge by now! Anyway, he can have them and also have the pleasure of cleaning up after them as well! I’ve chlorinated the water since removing the fish and it’s worked out just fine! I put one 4” puck of chlorine in the water about once a week and test the water like I would a swimming pool and the water is crystal clear! No slime or algae in the pond at all and that’s just fine with me!

Today I decided to give the body shop a call that’s going to do the work in the MG for us. I hadn’t heard yet how much I’d have to add to the insurance claim to have the whole car painted and since I was asked to drop the MG off to be repaired on the 18th of June I figured I’d like to know how much it’s going to cost! LOL!

I called the shop and was told once again that the owner was busy but would call me back within the hour. Finally I got a call from his secretary to tell me that the additional cost to me to have the whole car cleaned up of a few small rust spots and repainted would only be $1800.00! I was dumfounded when I heard that amount and asked if she was sure that’s the price and she assured me that I had heard her right! I guess I should count myself lucky that they’re able to do it for such a good price. He had told me that depending on the amount of work required by the insurance claim he could make use of some of the insurance money toward the entire body and paint job and it might not cost me too much on top of the claim to complete the job. WOW! I’m impressed with the quote and I sure hope I’ll be impressed with the quality of his work! Can’t wait to get it into the shop and get it back to see the results! I’m sure he’ll do a good job since I’ve seen some of the other work that they were doing on vehicles at his shop when I visited to arrange the work on the MG! Anyway, I’m really looking forward to having it fixed and painted all one colour finally. I’ll be sure to send out a few photos once we get the MG back home again.

I’ve attended a couple of “Cruise Nights” in Baden Ontario this past two weeks. They hold what they call “Cruisin’ At The Pond” on Wednesday evenings from 5pm to 8pm during June through to the end of August and they attract quite a crowd and about 100 vehicles each time. What a variety of vehicles they attract too! Everything from Mini’s to Corvettes and antiques to trucks! This past Wednesday evening they even had a huge antique John Deere Tractor in mint condition. It was one of the old style tractors with the pigeon toed front wheels. I’d say the thing was about 8 feet tall and sounded like a hot rod when the owner fired it up to leave the site. The tires were at least 6 feet tall themselves and the owner was at least 6’ 2” tall and weighed in at what I’d guess to be around the 300 lb mark! He suited the size of his vehicle, that’s for sure! I don’t know how many times I’ve driven through Baden over the past 50 years or more and until this month I never knew there was a pond in the middle of the village! Go figure!
Like they say, you learn something new every day!

That’s about all for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!

Bye for now… Greg

PS: Something To Think About>
Life is thickly sown with thorns and I know of no remedy other than to pass through them quickly. The longer we dwell on misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.

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Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
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