The Squamidian Report – March 12 / 16
Issue #720
Including:
Lorne's Bird
The Ontarion
Hi All,
It took longer than expected but I got there. 400! Thats how many
times, as of last Sunday afternoon, that I've been up the gondola since
it opened. The reason it took longer than expected is that is has
rained of 2 months straight around here and many of those rainy days
were also quite stormy. On stormy days when the winds pick up they shut
down the gondola for safety reasons and on those days no one goes up,
no even me. Don't they know who I think I am? ;)
Its not that its a contest or race or any such thing, we just tend to
go up there for a nice morning walk almost every day. But, the days
that they must remain closed do tend to cut into our routine. Now when
I say its rained for 2 months straight, I'm not implying 'none-stop'.
On lots of days it only rained all night, or all afternoon or whatever.
There has even been some sunshine on some of those days where it didn't
rain all day. But there has been lots of days where it did rain
none-stop for days on end and this past week has been just that. When
those Pacific storms pump in one after another it can start to get a
bit endless. And when they include gail force winds, well, trees come
down, power goes out in may areas of the Lower Mainland and gondolas
close.
Its kind of fun to do the math regarding 400+ times up the gondola
because that also means 400 times back down. I'm not stupid enough to
walk back down. Heck, even the fitness freaks who hike up don't walk
back down, they ride. Its a 2km trip in each direction, therefore, its
a round trip on 4km. Therefore, I've now travelled over 1600km riding
up and down in those gondolas. Thats a thousand horizontal miles. The
ride each way climbs or descends, depending on direction, about a
kilometer. Therefore, over those same 400+ trips, I've ascended 400km
and descended 400km. Good thing they cancel each other out or I'd be
left stranded at some weird altitude.
Getting back to closures due to the weather, the gondola was closed
again this past Thursday, high winds and driving rain being the reason.
So, we went down to Maple Ridge. 'The Wife' heads east again this
coming Sunday and she wanted to see the youngest granddaughter before
leaving, and wanted to fetch Kyra up to our place for a few days. That
drive down was rather stressful. Driving rain and howling winds made
controlling a car exhausting and the resultant traffic mess made it
even more so. To make it worse, power was out in many areas meaning
that the traffic signal lights were out. Four lane busy streets that
are always choked with traffic become even more scary under
conditions like that. Many of the intersections with lights out, or
malfunctioning lights, had the expected crashes. Many drivers are so
unaware of what is going on around them that they just sail right on
through, paying no attention at all to anything. Not a fun drive. The
drive home was a bit better and once we left the Lower Mainland behind
as we rounded the curve above Horseshoe Bay, we could relax. From there
on up to 'here' the only issue was wind and rain. We were ahead of the
commuter crush that heads back up to Squamish every evening, and the
adrenalin junkies that head for Whistler. We had left Willow at home.
She was glad to see us, she always seems to think she has been
abandoned forever, and she was excited to see Kyra. Kyra is always
excited and happy to be at our place, so the day ended just fine.
doug
****
Lorne's Bird
Thursday March 10. Hearing a tapping noise in the sunroom
area, I thought first a tree branch was blowing against a window.
However there is no wind. I then stood in the room to find out what was
making the noise. Noticed a female robin is repeatedly
frying or jumping from the porch railing to the window a distance of
about 18". She would hit the window with her beak then bounce
back to the railing. After many unsuccessful attempts to get in to
build a nest, she then went around the corner to the next window
and from an evergreen about 3' away, her urgent drive to get inside to
build her nest and raise her young was too overpowering to ever give
up. Finely I opened the door and had a long talk with her about the
possible injury that could occur, she took my advise to heart and flew
into a nearby tree. Great if she can find a more suitable spot nearby
even though her hungry family will find fresh peas in the garden and
strip the cherry tree.
Lorne
****
THE ONTARION REPORT
Hello everyone!
Things are looking up as far as the coming of spring goes! Today I
spotted my first Robin. He was sitting on the corner of our garage roof
and was a fine specimen indeed. I’d say he hasn’t missed a meal all
winter, as he was one of the plumpest Robins I’ve ever seen. Good to
see that he weathered the winter in style and returned home well fed.
He wasn’t the only healthy specimen of nature seen around here today,
Carole spotted a grey squirrel bounding along on top of our fence and
he also looked like he’d been enjoying three meals a day all winter. I
guess with the mild winter season our outdoor friends have seen no need
to hibernate for more than a week or two at a time as the odd snowstorm
blanketed southern Ontario. We even have a chipmunk living under our
front porch and he’s opened up an exit at both ends of the porch at
lease three weeks ago. We’ve seen his tracks in the limited snow we
have had quite often all winter. I guess even the “Chippie” didn’t
sleep much in the warm earth beneath our concrete porch. Oh well, with
an early start to spring eating, most of the animals should be good and
healthy this year.
Speaking of squirrels, our Prime Minister has emerged on the other side
of the border and is causing quite a stir for the first time in almost
20 years in Washington. Let’s hope he accomplishes something more than
just getting his face on every US magazine while he’s down there. He
should fit right in with the rest of the nuts in the American capital!
Maybe he’ll light up a “doobie” with Barry and get him to change his
mind about the trans continental pipeline so we can get our Alberta oil
workers back on the job! So far I haven’t heard anything about an
official agenda for Justin’s visit. From what I’ve heard on the news,
the most important item on their itinerary is whether or not the
Whitehouse chef served them maple syrup from Canada or Vermont. Seems
like the Americans can’t get anything right! Oh yeah, they did manage
to set the dinner table with dinner ware in Sophie’s favourite colour
so I guess that’s saying something. Do any of the American people even
care that our PM is in Washington to meet with their President? I doubt
that most of them even know he’s in the US Capital! Oh well, as long as
the reporters that take a moment away from writing about Donald Trump’s
smart mouth get the colour of Sophie’s dress right I guess at least
someone is paying attention. Hopefully this historical meeting will
accomplish something worthwhile and it won’t go down in the annals of
history as Justin’s last supper! With Obama having only 7 months left
of his term as President, I’d be surprised if anyone other than the
fashion magazines even gives a damn that these two leaders are meeting.
One is almost a “has been” and the other is a young rookie grade 10
teacher whose only political experience comes from being a former PM’s
son with a mother who’s claim to fame is that she made love to The
Rolling Stones and showed off her private parts at Studio 54 in New
York while her Husband cursed “Fuddle Duddle” at the reporters in
Ottawa when asked about forcing his personal choice for the design of
the “New” Canadian flag on the citizens of the Great White North! If
nothing else, the Trudeau family knows how to get their faces in the
news! One thing’s for sure, Justin is a helluva lot prettier than
Pierre Elliot ever was so lets hope that even though he’s another
“Liberal”, that he does something constructive while he’s in office.
He’s got 4 years to either make Canada a better place to live (If
that’s possible) or like his Liberal predecessors, drive us so deeply
into debt that we’ll be borrowing from the Chinese to keep afloat! His
counterpart in the Ontario Liberal Party thinks she has all the answers
and when she’s up against the wall she just turns around and sells
another asset out from under the citizens to pay for her blunder! Now
she’s paying the Chinese $16,000,000.00 to set up shop in Waterloo to
compete with Blackberry and using our tax money to do so! I wonder how
much her cut of the pie is worth? Let’s remember her mistakes come time
to elect the next Provincial Government! Trudeau has 4 years to shit or
get off the pot, let’s hope he isn’t sitting on the same pot as our
provincial princess!
As you can tell, I’m starting to lose it here so I’ll call it a day for this week’s column!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!
Bye for now … Greg
PS: Something To Think About>
Where is the world’s most populated city?
Shanghai China:
At a whopping 24,150,000 permanent inhabitants, Shanghai is the only city that is home to over 24 million people!
****
Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.
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