The Squamidian Report – Dec. 19 / 15
 
Issue #708

Including:
From Russ
The Ontarion

Hi All,

Its winter at the gondola, in time for Christmas and it doesn't get much better. Several feet of mountain snow makes for a winter wonderland. The walking trails are well packed and relatively easy to walk on, and they have set the 'back country' trails aside for skis and snowshoes. We took Kyra up on both Monday and Tuesday and she had the time of her life. The snow-line, at that time, was down at about tower #6 and it was all we could do to contain her excitement from there on up. She spent as much time as we could allow her playing in and eating the white stuff. And don't worry, its all fresh and clean. Funny how kids of all ages seem to love the first snows of winter. Everyone up there is smiling from ear to ear these days.

On Wednesday 'The Wife' and I finally had a chance to try out the new snowshoes we bought last winter. They were on sale for a price we couldn't turn down. We still have our old, heavy wood and rawhide snowshoes but they need new bindings and are just big and clunky and out dated. These new ones are those high tech things with ice cleats on the underside and built-in bindings that stay done up. They go one easily and stay on. We headed back into the area behind the gondola where the snow was deep and the trees all had a nice coating of the white stuff. I was quite amazed at how well the new style of snowshoe works. They don't have the same surface area for flotation but there is no slipping, just walk along and enjoy the surrounding. We came back tired and happy.

Next day we decided to just walk the Panorama trail, simply because the weather was closing in and we didn't want to get too far from the lodge. Some of you are familiar with that walk. So we left the snowshoes at home and used our crampons. They fit tightly to the bottom of your boots and have spikes sticking down so you don't slip on ice or packed snow. Again, a very enjoyable outing. There was light snow falling just to make it that much better. That evening, much to everyone's surprise and some people's delight, Environment Canada put our area, right down to sea level, under a snowfall warning with expected amounts ranging anywhere from 5cm to 15cm. Cool. Next morning we woke to a good foot of snow. West coast heavy packing snow. Now, remember back over a month ago when I brought the snow blower out and serviced it and parked it in the garage for 'gust incase', well, 'gust incase' was here. That foot of snow put the old Toro through quite a workout but she did the job. I just wish the local municipality would 'do the job' when it comes to ploughing our streets. They don't plough the streets, they just make a big mess that drivers must then negotiate in order to go anywhere. But I digress... all of a sudden we have a winter wonderland all around us, not just up at the gondola and in the high country. Some of the lower elevation snow might melt over the next few days, or, it might all get added to, making for a white Christmas. Time will tell. Its a sure bet for a white Christmas at the gondola and a pretty good bet for at our place. Hard to say for down the hill and in town. As long as we don't have any temperature inversions we are looking good.
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I guess this is the last Squamidian before Christmas, as next week's falls on the 26th. So technically, this it the Christmas issue. A big Merry Christmas to everyone and I'd like to thank Russ for sending in his article below, and a big thanks to Greg for all his work including his series on their Europe trip.

doug
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From Russ
A PAIN IN THE BUTT
 
I have a pain in the Butt.....in fact, "almost everything below my waist gives me a pain, and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work" (George Burns)
Pain pills are useless, so I'm considering Marijuana.  With Justin making it legal across Canada, and Katherine wanting to sell it through LCBO outlets in Ontario, "pot" is going to be "flying off the shelves!"
 
I used to smoke cigarettes years ago.....rolled-my-own to save money.....do they still sell "Ogden's Fine-Cut"?  I'll have to practice rolling-my-own all over again, but wait; doesn't smoking cigarettes cause Cancer? No one is suggesting smoking a "joint" causes Cancer.......or does it?
 
Question:  How come our Governments are urging us to quit smoking, while at the same time encouraging smoking "pot" both for medical and recreational use?
Answer: Another "Tax Grab"
 
I haven't had anything alcoholic except Communion Wine for 20 years, but because I"ll be going to the LCBO for my "pot", I might as well buy a "jug" while I'm at it. Those against making booze and pot available in the same store, say "the combination of consumption of these drugs can cause 'dangerous and unpredictable' results...like a
 
one and one-half oz. drink
plus two joints equals X (being
an unknown result)"
 
And with beer now on the shelves with our groceries, we can just add it to our "Weekly grocery Budget", and as beer has "actual food value", we can give it to our children without comitting an offence and without feeling "guilty"
 
"Would you like a Blue-Light with your low-fat cheese and organic lettuce sandwich, Billy?"
 
The Government wants us to feed our children a healthy, nutritious Lunch befor they go back to school.
 
Health Science tells us that consuming large quantities of alcohol can actually kill us!  But, fortunately, our body has built-in safety features that "usually" shut us down by vomiting or passing out before death occurs.  However, by mixing alcohol and marijuana, these safeguards may be rendered ineffective, hence the dangerous and unpredictable behaviour, like panic, halucinating, unconsciousness, and even death.
 
So, if I seriously DID go back to drinking and smoking, and as a result suffered irreversible, and extremely painful terminal illness, not to worry, as "Doctor Assisted Death" is now an "easy way out", and I'll no longer have "A Pain In The Butt!"
 
Written with tongue-in-cheek, by Russ.
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THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone!
I’m just wondering how many immigrants from Syria our new PM is personally sponsoring here in their new country? Just food for thought!
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     We’re still waiting for our normal Canadian winter to strike here in KW but so far we’re experiencing only rain and above 0c temperatures. Guess we’ll just have to be patient! Maybe if we all start singing Bing Crosby’s famous “White Christmas” it’ll make a difference. Somehow it just doesn’t seem like Christmas is approaching without the white stuff on the ground. I say if we don’t have snow by the 24th of December we should just cancel Christmas altogether and jump right into “Spring”! No sense in celebrating if the kids can’t make use of their new sleds and toboggans on Christmas Day! In fact, the local news had some footage of the ice rink in front of City Hall and it looks more like a swimming pool! Guess they may have to turn on the ice-making machine imbedded in the floor of the rink. I’m sure they were hoping that Mother Nature would do that job for them and the city fathers could brag about how much they saved the taxpayers by not turning the system on this year. There is one bonus all the residents of Kitchener can be happy about and that’s the fact that their gas furnaces haven’t had to run much so far this season. We’ve been living with the heat our gas fireplace puts out when we do need a little boost of heat. It’s cheaper to run the fireplace for a half hour than it is to run the furnace. We spend most of our inactive hours watching TV in the family room where the fireplace is located and I installed a door on that room about a year after we moved in to this house in 1998. It holds the heat in for the remainder of the evening once I’ve had the fireplace burning for the first half hour. Can’t complain about the gas bills with that being the only source of heat used so far. I wouldn’t be upset if the rest of this winter turned out the way the first couple of months has been! It’s hard to believe its mid December. Our grass is still bright green and it even seems to be in need of a mowing! If we make it to January first without any significant freeze I may just whip out the lawn mower and perform a first “mid-winter” cutting ever! Wouldn’t that be a picture? I do remember a couple of unusual photos I’ve posed for over the years but cutting the lawn would be a first for sure. I’ve posed for a photo the day I took my motorcycle out for a spin on January 11th a few years ago. Carole also took my photo one year back in the early 80’s on our green front lawn on Christmas Day posing with my snow blower while wearing shorts and a tee shirt! Now that was a cool pic to remember!

     Speaking of photos, I don’t know if I mentioned how many photos Adam took with his new digital camera while we were in Europe in September. He was able to shoot picture after picture of anything and everything that looked interesting while on the trip and of course he was able to do so without ever having to reload his camera with film like he would have back in the Kodak days! He just kept snapping shots of whatever took his fancy and by the time we got home to Kitchener we had no idea how many photos he had taken. After being home a couple of days we sat down over a few evenings and looked at about half of the photos from the trip. He showed us the pics in living colour on our 48” big screen TV and it didn’t cost a cent to develop or print them! What a change from the “old days” of photo albums! The only way of seeing one’s photos in such a large format years ago would have been to project them on a screen with a “slide” projector! Don’t laugh I still have one of those too! I even have about a thousand slides of family events over the past 43 years and before. I’ll have to dig them out sometime and look back over the family history! However, as I was saying about the modern way of photography, it produces pictures with incredible clarity and proficiency. When I asked Adam how many pictures he’d taken on the trip, he only had to touch a button on the camera to give us a running total of the number stored on the computer card within the camera. The total I believe was somewhere around the 7,000 mark! We spent four whole evenings looking at the photos from the trip and didn’t get half way through the total! Guess we’ll have many more evenings that we can spend looking at the photos. It’ll give us something to do if and when we get bored watching TV! It’s amazing what today’s modern cameras can do and that includes simply running a cord from the camera directly into the TV to view whatever is on the camera memory card.

    I’m sure you all remember the “Polaroid” cameras of the 60’s. I bet you thought they had gone the way of the “Dodo”. Well, they had for a number of years but I saw a commercial on TV the other night showing the latest version of the “Polaroid” camera and you got it, they’ve come out with a digital camera that prints your latest photos directly from the camera itself and they don’t take 5 minutes to show up on the paper, it’s instant! I haven’t seen one of these cameras personally but I’m sure with the added feature of printing the photos, there will be a cost for the paper pack that goes with each camera’s ability to print the photos out! I’d say this process will be a tad costly but at least you wont have to take the film in to a camera store to have them printed. It’ll be interesting how well these new Polaroid cameras catch on but my guess is they won’t be too popular when people can already print their photos on a home printer!
The modern age of computers is indeed incredible and it makes you wonder what they’ll come up with next!
Guess we won’t have to wait very long to see what’s next!

That’s about it for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll be looking forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!

Bye for now … Greg

PS: Something To Think About>
It makes no difference where you are or what you’re doing just keep in mind “Smile! You’re On Candid Camera!”

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Have a good one..
the doug
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