The Squamidian Report – Dec. 20 / 14
 
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Issue #656

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The Ontarion

Hi All,

It only seems like a year ago when I last said this, but wow, this is our last issue before Christmas. Where did the time go? And of course we are all a year older than we were this time last year. Bet that thought cheers us all up...

Something I remember liking this time of year as a kid (and yes, I can remember that long ago, at least the things I've chosen not to forget) was driving around to look at the Christmas lights. In those days cars didn't have great defroster systems and there would have been 4 or 5 of us stuffed into the back seat of the car so it made looking out through the iced-up windows difficult but we did manage to see the decorative lights. We'd drive in to Kitchener and then through some of the neighborhoods. Some had very little lighting, others were decked out from one end to the other. That sounded funny, we'd 'drive in to Kitchener'. In those days Kitchener was way up highway 8 and we would have gone through Centerville and up highway #8 to get there or we'd have gone the other way that took us past Gamble's garage at the bottom of a hill thats not there anymore and on in via Sheldon Ave. Now Kitchener has long-since engulfed the area we lived in, leaving the homestead like a tiny island in a sea of sprawl.

Then a few decades later 'The Wife' and I would do the same, drive around to look at the lights but we were then the adults and Ryan was the kid in the back seat. The windows were no longer fogged up but he probably did as much complaining as the 5 of us as kids had done years earlier. Seems each generation of kids have shorter attention spans and higher expectations than the one before. Then those years were gone, faded into the past and now we find ourselves driving around to see the lights as retired seniors. The windows are clear but there is again a little voice in the back seat, strapped tightly into her car seat. She's quite interested but not nearly as impressed. Turns out that for some reason this current generation needs more than just a big bright display of lighting, they want so see those big blow-up things. You know, blow-up Santa or blow-up Rudolf or train or whatever. Those things use a fan to inflate and stay inflated, and have internal illumination so they stand out brightly. I guess thats ok, some sort of progress because they do tend to move a bit in the breeze and face it, if something nowadays does not include some level of 'animation', its apparently basically a dud.

But something has not changed, its been going on since before we came along. It will have happened to any of you who have tried to see the Christmas lights, you find a nicely lit street and begin to drive along slowly so you can see and enjoy the display only to have some impatient jerk pull up right behind you, with his (or hers) headlights searing through your back window and side mirrors, blinding you. If they pulled up any closer you'd be able to shut your vehicle off because they'd be pushing you along. At some point they rush on by, go roaring on up the street only to pull into a driveway and park. Grumpy old farts like me would like nothing better than to come back later and let the air out of their tires but 'wives' don't see it that way. You'd think one of the perks of getting old would be to stomp on the idiots, morons and jerks that will most likely get old someday as well and want to stomp on their perceived idiots, morons and jerks, but no, we must behave ourselves, or so we are told.

There are some sufficiently impressive lighting displays in the area to suitably impress the granddaughter. It would be interesting to see what will be needed to impress the generation she will most likely help bring in to existence at some point a couple of decades from now, in the unknowable future. For now we will simply enjoy the lights as best we can, hopefully instilling our Christmas tradition of driving around to see the lights and let their brightness and colors renew our Christmas spirits. They always seem to. But look at how those lights have changed over the years. From big fragile hot incandescent bulbs wired in series, so frustrating to anyone trying to find out which bulb was burned out and responsible for the whole string not working, to smaller bulbs with the same wiring deficiencies, to tiny little bulbs and now on to LEDs that don't burn out and don't burn your fingers and yet produce very bright vibrant colors. What will the Christmas light displays look like in twenty plus years when Kyra drives her children around to see them? Perhaps I'll be along for the ride as well, sitting in the back seat and most likely complaining about who knows what, perhaps about the inevitable jerk thats in a big hurry, driving way too close behind us with his headlights glaring through our back window and mirrors.
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Willow has a new bed. Sort of. For some reason 'The Wife' decided that 'The Dog' needed a new, posh, soft comfy bed and picked one up while in the city shopping. Basically, Willow simply ignored it, wouldn't even give it a second glance. That bugged 'The Wife' but what can you do. Then, 'The Granddaughter ' decided it would be a great thing to lay on, jump on, play on and so on. Well, that indicated to Willow that this new 'thing' must be something to want, use and enjoy. As soon as 'The Granddaughter' vacated the bed, which is really just a big flat pillow currently laying in the middle of the living room, 'The Dog' climbed in and happily nodded off to sleep. Now, they seem to take turns, when one isn't using the thing as a bed, the other is using it as a play area.
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After running the story in last weeks Squamidian that Lorne had submitted 10 years ago, there had been some nice follow-up remarks which is great because it not only indicates interest in the story, but indicates that there is actually 'someone out there'. There had also been some puzzlement as to how I had dug up the article. Well, it was not all that hard. You see, all the old issues are available on-line, on my web site, arranged by each year. All I did was re-read some of the old issues on the off chance there was something of interest pertaining to a Christmas theme worthy of bringing forward. It can be quite interesting to brows the old issues to see what we were talking about, what we were doing and so on. In a lot of ways, not much has changed over the years. Some weeks there simply was not much to write about and it sure showed, and other weeks it just seemed to flow. I'm sure Greg would agree with that, some weeks were a real pain to write and other weeks it just comes easily. Its hit and miss, you just never know. But I digress; all the old issues right from the beginning are there, for whats thats worth. But what does matter is each year we did a Christmas issue and this one is this year's issue so, Merry Christmas. Hope everyone is and stays safe and well. Have a great one.

doug
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THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone!

Well, here we are at the end of another year and just heading into Christmas week! Sure is exciting for most of us at this time of year and of course I can’t help thinking back to when I was a kid and looking forward to Christmas. Back then we were still being encouraged to attend Church every Sunday and our parents made sure we remembered and practiced the true meaning of Christmas every year. The occasion wasn’t all commercial and no religion in those days. Now, I’m not going to get on my soapbox and start preaching but I just wanted my loyal readers to know that there is a serious side to me and for the most part I was brought up well enough to appreciate the beliefs of my parents and consequently the beliefs instilled in me through attending St John The Evangelist Anglican Church at the corner of Duke and Water St’s in Kitchener. Back in those days I enjoyed attending church and had lots of friends through our membership at St John’s. However, once I got older and into high school I drifted away from regular attendance at church and in time and adulthood got married and had a family and the church and attendance thereof changed. However I still appreciate the foundation of religion that has given me a sense of good morals and love for my fellow man. I like to think that I’ve always treated people with the respect they deserve and try to do so throughout the year, not just at Christmas time!

When we were kids of course the commercial part of Christmas was just coming into being! That was the early 50’s (born in January 1949) and the excitement of Christmas and of course Christmas morning was very much a part of the season. We usually went to church on Christmas Eve for a candle light service and that left Christmas day open for the Santa part of the celebration. I used to and still do love giving and of course opening gifts on Christmas Day. I’ve always loved the anticipation leading up to that morning but the most fun was seeing what everyone got as we all opened our presents from Santa and from each other. Even when I was an 11 year old boy earning $3.00 a week for working Friday evenings and Saturdays carrying clothes from downtown clothing stores to the Tailor shop I worked for and delivering them back once the alterations had been made, I managed to buy some pretty nice gifts for the members of my family. That meant I had to buy four gifts in all, one for Mum, one for Dad and one each for my brother and my sister. It was always just as much fun watching their excitement as they opened what I had given each of them as it was opening what had been left under the tree for me! It was amazing what that little cash payment from Morris Custom Tailor’s managed to buy. I still had enough money to save some for my bank account and have spending money in my pocket as well! Christmas Eve was the special time that became a challenge for us kids. We would always try our best to stay awake after going to bed, just so we could hear any sounds that might be the tapping of reindeer hooves on the ridge of the roof or even the sound of Santa as he placed the gifts beneath the tree in the living room. One Christmas, mum and dad even let us sleep on the floor of the living room next to the tree so we wouldn’t miss Santa when he arrived. Well, we all know how successful that was! Ho Ho Ho, we awoke in the morning with gifts piled all around us and couldn’t figure how Santa managed to put them there and not wake us up! Oh well, that mystery was soon a memory and of course up until the year we all decided not to believe in him any more, he succeeded in getting in and out of our house without ever making a sound!
 
When we think back, those many Christmases have given us loads of lovely memories and stories that we were able to relay to our son as he experienced each Christmas in his life. Of course now that he’s a grown man he can remind us of his memories of this special time of year and his thoughts of Santa. Each year as we raised our own family we videotaped each Christmas morning as we gathered by the tree to open the presents left by Santa. It’s once again great to be able to think back to “our” family Christmas mornings and one of these days we’ll have to dig out all of the VHS tapes containing those memories and watch them! That is, IF I can find a VHS Player that still works! LOL!

Sounds like a fun project for an evening of reminiscing! With that in mind, I wish you all a Very Merry Christmas this year and I’ll look forward to hearing some good stories of the season from your house, if some or all of you would care to share a story or two with the rest of the Squamidian Family members in the weeks to come!

May you all be healthy, happy and warm this Christmas!

That’s it for this week and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!

Bye for now … Greg

PS: Something To Think About>
Strawberries are the only fruits whose seeds grow on the outside! (Sorry, couldn’t think of a Christmas related one!)
(But, strawberries are red like Santa’s suit!)

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Have a good one..
the doug
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