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The
Squamidian Report – April 20 / 24
Online
Versions
Of This And Past Issues Issue
#1144 Russ Doug
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From Russ
...and do the twist! Leaving the Health Clinic after meeting with my new doctor, I was so impressed I felt I could "Do the Twist"! I use a 'walker' now that canes are no longer safe - somehow I twisted my left ankle and literally did the twist! It was a 'counter-clockwise' one and unscrewed my right shoe. As I began falling I cried-out sounding like a Beagle hound - Owwww!! Luckily, my son, Greg was walking a little ahead of me, and was able to join me on the way down, making the landing less hard. I couldn't get up. Although weighing only 150Lbs., Greg was having no luck - two couples nearby heard, and saw what was going down, and rushed over to help. It took three men and two women (acting as 'cheer-leaders') to accomplish my erection. Luckily, the clinic is right beside the hospital and that's where I didn't go, but should have. One of the kind ladies put on my right shoe (none of the men though of it), and we thanked them for their help and carried-on. I managed to sprain my ankle, bruise me left elbow, and twist my lower back. * Last week I posed the question: "What am I?" and gave some helpful clues. A few of my favourite Squamidians responded to my Quiz, but said they had no idea what I am. So here are a few more clues - in fact I provide several 'nicknames' people use, plus the correct answer! What am I? I have what you humans call teeth, two inward-sloping rows of them, they are hard to see so I appear 'toothless'. I neither chew, nor bite my food because the 'studs' in my large, oval mouth are not made for that - they have two purposes - one to prevent my live meals from escaping; the other, to safely house my young from predators. What do I eat you ask? Bugs, water spiders, worms and algae and other harmful plants found in my 'ball-park'. In fact, I'm considered very helpful in keeping our rivers, streams and other waterways clean and free of algae. Let me boast a little. In order not to destroy me and my habitat, major construction projects have been altered or cancelled! We have many relatives who have two or four legs - I have none. They come in many sizes - some up to eight inches in length - they have teeth and live on frogs, mice, and are sometimes cannibalistic. I'm only 3 or 4 inches long. Now, here are some names people give us: Because we can 'bark', they call us 'mud dogs'; in the US South we're called 'mud skippers'. My Dad called them 'mud puppies'. I'm also given the names of 'Newt'; 'Coypu' , and 'Sea serpent'; or would you believe 'Aquatic Salamander'? Good news/bad news - we may live for up to twenty years (unless some motor vehicle kills us as we attempt to cross a roadway), but must wait until we're 10 before we may have sex. (sounds like my childhood!) There you are. You have all the clues and my correct name. What am I? It's been a "Hoot"!
Uncle Russ. ****
From Doug
How’s it going…..eh? Time for another chapter in the seemingly never ending saga of my cataract surgeries and I must say, I’m a bit bummed out. As you may recall, my right eye had some issues (or something) during it’s surgery and it felt like a dull spoon was the tool of choice, digging away in there with no regard for my personal comfort. The new lens for that eye was 3 times the price of the usual, off-the-shelf lenses but was supposed to solve some vision issues and all would be right with the world. However, vision never quite cleared up and in fact was dark and cloudy right from the beginning. The left eye was a total success so I have a good way of comparing the results. The right eye never gained any amount of night vision and objects are not just blurry but there are multiple images instead of a single clear image. If I were to look at a star or the moon or a street light I see about 7 versions of it instead of one. My local optometrist had informed me that the lens had clouded over causing the darkness and that the blurry effect was from scar tissue, and, that it all could be easily repaired via laser treatment. Laser treatment would be fast and easy and once done, all should be good. To that end I was again referred to the specialist way down in the city who’s office is in a hard to get to down town building. Luckily for me, Ryan was available to take me there and back this past Monday for that appointment. After sitting in the over crowded waiting room for what seemed like for ever, I was finally called in to have the same tests done that the local guy had done and I figured I’d be getting another big bill for that. Then, after more waiting, the specialist called me in and he rechecked everything and tested everything and asked about everything. Then he suggested that the best route forward would be to remove this lens and replace it with the same type that is in my left eye. I didn’t even know that was possible. I told him my local optometrist had suggested laser surgery but the specialist declined that idea because the cloudiness had been right from the beginning, ‘normal’ cloudiness happens over time, the blurriness and multiple vision was due to how this lens was not working for my eye, and so on. So, now I’m looking at going through the whole thing again for my right eye once the procedure can be scheduled which could be who knows how far away. One good thing was that he waved the diagnostic fees ($1000.00) this time. The procedure to remove the current synthetic lens is a bit more involved than removing an organic lens and the whole eye will be frozen this time. As a result, there will be no vision in that eye for a day or so after the procedure but that’s how it will have to be. Once this is all over vision should be similar to my left eye and that’s ok with me. Now the waiting begins, again. - In another medically related subject, a while back the government announced that it would be advantageous for those of us over 65 and those with health issues to receive a Covid booster every 6 months. I have no problem with that and have been expecting an ‘invitation’ to book my next shot to turn up in my email inbox. Well, on Thursday morning as we were trying to figure out what to do about Carol and Al’s flight debacle my phone announced that I had a new text message. It was from the BC health system telling me that I could now book my next booster, simply follow the link provided. I didn’t have time to deal with it right then and there as we had to get Carol and Al to the bus pickup location so they could get to the airport for their flight which had been cancelled sometime during the night. After dropping them off Sue and I headed on up to the gondola to relax over a coffee. Once we got home I opened the email version of the text message and proceeded to book my appointment. This was about five to eleven in the morning. It turned out that there was an available time slot at the usual vaccination location (beside my grocery store), slated for 11:30. Well, I clicked on that, printed off the confirmation info, and headed in. The place was almost empty, with one client sitting in the post-shot area where you wait a few minutes before leaving, and 4 shot-givers sitting around chatting. Within a minute or so I was sitting with one of the shot-givers and as we chatted about everything under the sun, she did the jab which I almost didn’t feel at all and it was done and over with. I actually asked if she had done it as I didn’t feel it at all. Funny how some of them are so good at it. I think the times you do feel it is when the shot-giver is trying too hard. Anyway, in less than an hour from the time I booked the booster, I was back home again, all finish and boosted. Sometimes, not very often, but sometimes, things seem to work out very well. * A picture is worth a thousand words so here are two thousand words worth of pics taken when our visitors were here. The first is the Comox Glacier taken from the Powel River to Comox ferry. The glacier is near the left side of the shot. The second was taken at the eagle viewing place here in town. However, its the wrong time of year for eagles and the ones that are around are now busy nesting.
Doug ****
Have
a
Good One ****
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