The Squamidian Report – Jan. 29 / 22

Online Versions Of This And Past Issues
(Choose the year and then the date for the online issue you want)

Issue #1027
Including:

From Russ

The Ontarion


Howdy,

Well, we had weather again this week, just not quite the weather that was forecast. We were supposed to be on the receiving side of some rather nice days and nights with mild sunshine and clear nights that stayed above freezing. Of course no one bothered to tell the weather what it’s own forecast was. Temperatures that were promised to be around +10 during the days never quite made it to half that, and most places didn’t see all that much of the sun. Nights that were supposed to stay on the plus side managed to slide down to several degrees below freezing. But the biggest factor was the fog. Most of the VGA and coastal areas became blanketed in dense heavy fog making for a dark gloomy chilly time. Driving was treacherous as visibility stayed very poor for days on end and at night when some of that fog froze on the roads, becoming black ice. The interesting thing with the fog was, and is, is that it forms in the valley bottoms and along the low coastal areas. So, up at our place we enjoyed at least some of the promised sunshine. We could look down into the valley below as see nothing but the fog bank. When driving, we would leave clear air and enter the fog as we headed down hill. Same with at the gondola where we often go to enjoy a morning coffee. We’d leave here, drive into the fog, drive to the gondola in the fog, park, and head up in one of the cable cabin. By about tower 4 or 5 we’d emerge out of the top of the fog bank into clear sunny air again. At the top we’d have the views of the surrounding mountain, bathed in sunshine, and the views of the top of the fog shrouding the sound and the valley. On the ride back down we’d leave the sunshine and enter the dark thick fog again. At the bottom it would be gloomy and chilly. Makes for an interesting coffee experience.

At times the fog retreated down below us from the Squamish area and the town did get at least some of the promised sunshine, but never got the promised mild temperatures. So, we have not lost near as much of the snow cover at we’d hoped. The piles along the streets have gone down sufficiently to make driving safer as we can see over them at the intersections. That’s a good thing. Most of the snow down in the valley is gone, except for the piles, up here our lawns are still covered with a foot or two of compressed icy snow. But, its still January so that to is ok.

*

I was going to rant about how disgusted I am with the trucking convoy that is headed to Ottawa, and the idiots who have jumped on that band wagon to protest doing what has to be done and everything else they don’t like. This whole thing reminds me of some brain dead US Republican show of stupidity. But, I’m not going to go down that path. You can’t fix stupid and we are probably stuck with this kind of behavior because our governments at all levels didn’t and wouldn't take a firm stand when the pandemic started. So, I’m going to talk about the fact that I have a cold head, not to be confused with a head cold. Two very different things. I have a cold head because I just had my semi-annual hair cut. I used to go to the barber more often but since the pandemic started I’m not real comfortable sitting in a barber chair with someone working around my head. My hair grows fast, very fast, and I had nice long curly locks hanging down the back of my neck. That didn’t bother me at all. What bothered me was the rest of my hair, sticking out in all directions making me look like some sort of mad scientist from a B-grade movie. Because the stuff on my head is very fine, it just does what it wants to do, pointing in every direction possible. Anyway, my hair is now cut nice and short, my head is cold because that layer of insulation is gone. By the time the barber was done, the floor around the chair looked like a Schnauzer had exploded. That always strikes me as funny when I see the grey mess all over the place. And it strikes me as a big waist of energy, because I had to grow that stuff in the first place. Such is life.

doug

****

From Russ

Cats - either you love them or you hate them!

Aunt Edna loved cats. Eddy Mansz hated cats.

Some think black cats are 'witches', others are suspicious of black cats – it's bad luck if one crosses their path!

We give animals a 'bad name' when we say:

    "Dirty as a pig"

        "Eats like a horse"

            "Awkward as a cow"

                "Never trust a dead weasel"

                    "Who you shoving - you big ape?"

                        "Don't be chicken - jump in!"

But CATS take the cake! "That crazy old cat puts her nose into everybody's business!"

"He's out catting around while I'm looking after the kids!"

"She's weak as a kitten"

"Mary can be such a cat, you know!"

"She's conceited as a barber's cat"

"He's as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs"

" . . . . a face like a cat's arse!"

"She has the morals of an alley cat!"

". . . . guilty as the cat that swallowed the canary"

"That pair fight like a cat and dog"

"You scaredy-cat - anybody can do that!"

"They have other cats to whip!"

"When they accused him, he was out-of-there like a scalded cat!"

"You look like something the cat dragged in!"

"Yup - innocent as the cat who stole the cream!"

"The room was so crowded you couldn't swing a cat in there!"

And finally, the expression, "A kick at the cat" (primarily heard in Canada) means "an opportunity to do, try, or achieve something". There is also a cruel game of kick/hoist the cat. The aim of the game is to see who can kick/hoist a live cat the highest. The cats reach heights of 15-20 feet in the air, and always land on their feet - apparently unharmed. If caught, the contestants are charged with "Cruelty to animals" a criminal offence which carries a hefty fine, plus jail time.

I have much more to say about cats, like "catgut", and "Cat-o-nine tails", so tune in again next week if you are interested.

Russ.

****


THE ONTARION REPORT


Hello everyone!

With the cold of this winter persisting, we’re all hoping for an early Spring! With the approaching of “Groundhog Day” we can only hope he doesn’t see his shadow since that means there will be an early Spring! SO, we’d better hope for a cloudy day on February 2nd! I always thought it was the other way around, that if he saw his shadow it meant an early Spring! Oh well, after looking up the official site for the occasion, I found that seeing his shadow meant it frightened him back into his den for at least another 6 weeks of winter! Yikes, just what we need this year, more weeks of winter than we’ve already had! Oh well, we are living in Canada “The Great White North” so it’s to be expected that we’ll have to put up with winter no matter how long it lasts!

When we were kids back in the 50’s and 60’s we used to love the winter months! This meant tobogganing sledding and ice skating on such rinks as the lake at Victoria Park in downtown Kitchener! I remember weekends with my mum and dad skating on that lake and in particular I remember my mother’s brother Ken “my Uncle” and his three boys and our family all gathering in the park for hot chocolate and an afternoon of whizzing around the lake. My uncle Ken was an avid Speed Skater and he had a set of those professional skates with the long pointed blades on them and Man, could he go on those interesting looking skates! I remember there was one Sunday afternoon when he was skating like an Olympic Speed Skater and he suddenly fell face first onto the ice. He injured his knees and had to go to the Hospital to have them patched up with bandages and stitches. He was unable to skate for the rest of the winter season and after that he decided to retire his speed skates for good! I don’t blame him, his knees were never the same again! It was a good thing he was also an avid fisherman so he could at least enjoy his summer months out on Lake Joseph in his boat fishing with his whole family! They used to bring home such huge lake trout and they would share them with my dad.

I remember seeing huge trout laying on Dad’s work bench in the basement and wondering what it would be like to hook onto one of those monster fish rather than the little “Shiners” and cat fish we used to catch on the small rivers my dad liked to take us to on weekends for a “fishing trip”. He liked to just stand on the river’s edge and fish for whatever we could manage to catch. Not that I’m complaining though, it was always fun for us kids. We used to cram as many neighbourhood kids as possible into dad’s Buick and he’d take us to the nearest river or even up to Belwood Lake at the Shand Dam in Fergus and we thought that was a great adventure! I remember sitting half way down the giant sloped walls of the dam and dropping my fishing line about 50 feet down into the rushing waters of the dam and hauling everything from Shiners to Trout up the long way onto the stones beside the dam! It was very exciting to say the least! At times it became a tad boring when we weren’t catching much but once I hooked onto something it made the trip all worthwhile! We used to take most of the fish home to show my mum what we’d caught and rather than cleaning the fish and eating them most times, Dad would burry them under mum’s rose bushes out back! She had the most beautiful roses in the neighbourhood every summer! I guess the fish worked like fertilizer and boosted the growth of the roses!

*

Speaking of amazing growth, Adam and I gave Carole a “Sprout Growing” appliance for Christmas and the literature we found on that counter top appliance said the growth would be amazing! All it consists of is a coffee pot sized plastic appliance that has it’s own small water pump in the bottom. All you have to do is lace a small tray inside the appliance with seeds of bean sprouts or other types of sprouts and the machine automatically sprinkles and heats the tray filled with the seeds. This keeps happening for 2 ˝ days and after that time period, you have a huge crop of sprouts that are wonderful to use in cooking such dinners as a “Stir Fry” or even place the sprouts on such food items as “Submarine Sandwiches” we weren’t sure how well this appliance would work we only knew that we all liked to eat bean sprouts. Well, this week Carole and Adam tried the sprout machine for the first time and it is literally amazing how quickly and abundantly the bean sprouts grow in this device! Tonight we had home made subs and with the fresh sprouts on the sandwiches they were incredible tasting! We were happy to see how successful this gift is and look forward to many great meals of Carole’s making in the future! It’ll indeed be interesting to try all the different kinds of sprouts that are available!

It’s always nice to see a gift of any kind be a successful one! This one will be put to good use for many years to come I’m sure!

That’s about all for this week folks!

Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!

Bye for now… Greg

PS: Something To Think About>

Will “Wiarton Willie” make the prediction you hope for next week? I’m hoping for a dull gray day!

****


Take Care And Be Safe
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.