Issue #919
Including:

From Lorne
From Russ
The Ontarion

Hi All,

Here we are, next year already again. Next decade as well, or not, depending on how you think about it. Numbering is generally from 1 to 10, not 0 to 9 in the normal world. (Computer binary counts in 8,s but that’s not the normal world). So, this past decade would correctly be from 2011 to 2021, not 2010 to 2020. You count 1 to 10 then you start over with 11, then 21, then 31 and so on. Or whatever.

New Years Eve was pretty well a wash out around here, literally. Most outdoor events in the Lower Mainland were cancelled due to a torrential downpour that went on for a few days. Fireworks couldn’t happen, just being outside required heavy duty rain gear and boots. Up here at our place, except for the sound of rain pounding on the rood, it was about as quiet as could be. Mainly because we were all asleep. With the little girls and their puppy here everyone was done by about 9pm. The kids went home Thursday morning so we then had a chance to tidy up the house and enjoy some solitude. And thankfully, its all over for another year.

The mountain passes and Interior got snow instead of rain but that didn’t do us any good. On the bright side, it’s too wet to mow the lawn and there is no danger of the liquid in the humming bird feeders freezing.

OK, a bit of Squamidian business….. we will not be here next weekend so I can’t put a newsletter together or send it out. Therefore, unless one of you volunteer to step up for that issue, there won’t be one. If someone will do it for the Jan 11^th issue please let me know. We are flying out on the 8^th for a quick visit back to Kitchener, flying home again on the 15^th. I’ll be able to take Greg out for breakfast to celebrate his 71^st birthday on the 11^th (he’s a paltry week and a half younger than I am). Obviously we will be there to visit with Lorne, but also hope to hook up with anyone else who is around and available.

doug

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From Lorne

"My urinal and I are no longer on speaking terms"

The pain on Saturday was unbearable so I called a friend and he came and helped me into bed Saturday evening and then came and helped me out Sunday morning. Up until then, I had stubbornly refused to come back to the hospital. My options were to die at home or come back here to die. By 10 o'clock Sun. morning some of the family had arrived and I said, " I'm giving in. Call the ambulance." They got me off in heavy rain and unloaded me in the street because of the back-up. I arrived into hallways that were absolutely jammed with gurneys containing a great deal of humanity. I was finally brought into an emergency cubicle at about 10 pm and was officially admitted. While I was in that emergency bed, they took me for my bone scan that had already been scheduled. Also, they did another cat scan, blood work and a physical check of my prostate. Carol said she would stay with me until I fell asleep. Then Carol took her weary body and went home. I remained in emergency until until about 9 pm on Monday night.

I was moved into a 2 bed room with a woman. I never spoke to her or saw her. All she did was lie there and cough. Shortly after, they moved me to another room because the first room was going to be used for isolation. I am now in a 4 bed unit next to a window that is 6 feet away because of the bathroom entrance so all I can see is the light of day.

My kids are glad I'm here because finally something is being done. I now have a urologist, oncologist, pain doctor and another doctor who is co-ordinating it all. All of the above - and then some - may appear in a novel I am planing to publish.

Part Two

I am really in the wrong hospital. Originally, my purpose here was to address a heart problem. Tests indicate that I should be in Grand River Hospital's cancer clinic. Therefore, transportation is required for whatever procedures are to be done there. Todays schedule was planned for a 6 am bowel cleansing followed by the prostate biopsy. Then word came that the enema would happen at 1 pm and 2:30 for the procedure. The most recent change has set the whole thing to happen tomorrow morning (Friday). Saturday's program is expected to be announced shortly.

Lorne

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From Russ

Happy New Year to all you faithful Squamidians!

Did you stay up to bring in 2020? Neither did I. Many years ago I had the good fortune to marry a Scots girl who's parents were steeped in the traditions and superstitions of Scotland. Following are just some of them we carried on:

Kissing at midnight; singing of ‘Auld Lang Syne’; making Resolutions; First footin’ (First footer).

KISSING at midnight; no matter where we were when the ‘magic hour’ struck we embraced and placed a big juicy smacker on each other’s kisser. (Oh how I miss that!)

Auld Lang Syne; We’d sing our hearts out to this familiar song (I confess I never knew the words until today!) I think I read somewhere that Robby Burns is credited with a poem he wrote in the 1700’s and translating auld lang syne means ‘days of long ago’ or ‘the good old days’. For those of you who confess to not knowing all the words to the said familiar song, I repeat them here:

Should old acquaintance be forgot,

And never brought to mind?

Should old acquaintance be forgot,

And days of auld lang syne ?

CHORUS:

For auld lang syne, my dear,

For auld lang syne,

We’ll take a cup of kindness yet,

For auld lang syne.

Making RESOLUTIONS – Many believe the first day of the New Year should be spent thinking about the past year and resolving to improve oneself in the coming year. Not all resolutions have to be a life-altering ordeal. Resolve small in the New Year and you’ll feel good that you got something accomplished.

First Footer or, First footin’; the first person to visit your home on New Year’s Day has significance. It is considered good luck for a man to be the first person to cross your threshold and you HAVE to let him in.

He shouldn’t use a key to let himself in. It’s even better luck if he’s tall and good-looking, with dark hair!

One thing I noticed about all these superstitions was that “they MADE the circumstances fit the conditions” - so that the superstition ‘lived on’.

It should also be noted here, that I used to hear my in-laws use the word HOGMANAY. It’s the Scot’s word for the last day of the year, and involves small groups of merry if not boisterous revelers going from home -to- home carrying food and drink, sharing if not ‘re-charging their mugs with ‘joy-juice’.

Other superstitions we observed were;

NOTHING SHOULD LEAVE THE HOUSE. Nothing should be taken out of the house (or thrown away) on New Year’s Day – not even the dirty bath water! You risk having bad luck for the entire new year. If something is added to your house (like a gift) – something may, in turn be taken away.

Researching these things has ‘cleared-up’ a few issues for me, and I hope ‘twas the same for you.

Your ‘Happy’ old Uncle Russ.

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THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone and welcome to a brand New Year!

This sort of thing happens so quickly every year that it’s hard to keep up with! On well, there’s no stopping it now! As long as we’re all here to witness it I guess it’ll just keep on keeping on!

We’ve made it through the holiday season with little or no problems to speak of and that’s a plus for sure. The weather has been very pleasant indeed this winter so far and we can only hope it stays mild until spring time. I’ve been thinking of purchasing a new or almost new pickup truck. I’ve always liked trucks as you may remember me saying in the past and it’s feeling like time to do it again. All I have to do is find a decent one for the right price. It’s just a matter of being patient enough until the right deal comes along I guess. I’m in no rush and that’s usually the best way to find the right bargain. My birthday is on January 11th so maybe the birthday fairy will bring me a pickup as a birthday gift, who knows? LOL!

The Christmas season takes a lot out of most of us as far as energy goes and this year was no exception. We’ve been run off our feet with shopping and whatever needed to be done just to get through this busy season. It’ll be nice to have it all over with and let things calm down for a while. I’ve got a few doctors’ appointments coming up in the next month or so and they all seem to come just one on top of the other. If I’m not at my family doctor’s I’m having the eye surgery that’s still needed on my right eye to stop the bursting blood vessels that are occurring because of my diabetes. This will be done at St Mary’s hospital instead of the Dr’s office this time. It’s the completion of the surgery started last month at the eye surgeon’s office. I’ll feel better having it done at the hospital this time. Then I’ve got to go back up to St Mary’s to have more surgery done on my scalp to try to keep ahead of the skin cancer that’s happening on top of my head. This time the surgeon said he’d have to graft some skin from my neck onto the spot where the flesh will be removed from my scalp. “OUCH”, It’s a never-ending battle to stop the spread of the cancer on the scalp. It’s all my fault for not using sunscreen for the past 50 or more years when outdoors. Of course when we were kids my mother never put sunscreen on us at the beach in the summer time. Of course back in the 50’s I don’t think there was such a thing as sunscreen. We used to plaster “tanning lotion” on to get as dark as possible in the summer sun. It’s no wonder we’re all having problems as adults! It’s like the cause of the weight problems the majority of us have been battling as adults from all the fattening foods we consumed during our lives. It’s only been the last 20 or so years that the health profession has been encouraging us to eat less fattening foods rather than try to diet after the damage was done! Like the German people say, “We get too soon old unt too late schmart!” so there’s not much we can do about it in our senior years!

I’ve been noticing this year that it seems more people are leaving their Christmas lights up than in other years. Maybe they’re just getting more and more lazy as the years go by. It used to be that most people were using either white strings of lights or blue strings of lights. This was a trend that had developed after the multi coloured strings of the 50’s and 60’s I guess it’s like anything else, they go in cycles. This year we noticed that more people are getting back to the multi coloured light strings again and it’s kind of a nice change to see this happening. I remember when we used to all get into my dad’s ’56 Buick Century and as a family we’d drive around the city to look at all the different Christmas displays of lights. It was a lot of fun at the time. One of our favourite streets to go and see was Maplewood Place. It’s a street that winds up a hill to a dead end circle at the top. It’s beside Breithaupt Park off of Union St in Kitchener. The residents of that street pooled their money many years ago and purchased a set of 9 reindeer (including Rudolph) and a sleigh with a huge Santa in it and each of 10 houses on that street would have one of the figures mounted on it’s roof! It was an attraction that garnered much attention every year for many years. I think they only stopped that tradition about 20 years ago. It had been happening since the early 50’s! It’s too bad such displays have to eventually come to an end. Oh well, maybe they’ll start it up again some day. The trend nowadays seems to be the huge blow up figures of Santa and Frosty the Snow Man and other figures that people anchor on their front lawns. The problem with these is that they attract vandalism! There have been items on the news about these figures being slashed by thoughtless vandals wielding pocketknives. It’s a shame indeed that these criminals have to spoil Christmas themes for the folks that go to the effort and expense of displaying these fun items for all to enjoy. This also brings to mind the latest trend toward “Porch Pirates” ripping off packages left on front porches by delivery services! Why people can’t mind their own business and keep their hands off of other’s property I’ll never know! I guess it’s a sign of the times, they think they see something they can have for nothing and away they go! It’s as if the police don’t have enough crime on their plates without having to deal with these jerks! Oh well, someone will come up with a solution to this bad habit such as booby trapping devices to attach to packages similar to the dye packs they use in bundles of money at most banks! However, even if they do develop something to combat this sort of theft, the crooks will find a way around it, they usually do!

The other thoughts on our minds these days are those concerning Lorne’s health. Carole and I sincerely wish him well and improvement in his condition! Our prayers are with you Lorne as I’m sure are those of the rest of your family and friends!

Here’s wishing all of the Squamidian family a Happy and Healthy New Year and an early and beautiful spring! Take care all of you and don’t forget to write your stories in to Doug for the Squid!

That’s about all I have for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!

Bye for now … Greg

PS: Something To Think About>
Cooperate: Remember the banana, every time it leaves the bunch it gets skinned!

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