The Squamidian Report – Aug. 10/19

Issue #898

Including:
From Russ
From ‘The Wife’
From Lorne
The Ontarion

Hi All,

Risky activities can and do jump up and bite those who participate. We live in a part of the world where a lot of people partake in risky activities and it keeps both our local search and rescue teams as well as the military SAR teams much busier than they’d like to be kept. There are constant instances of hikers getting lost or injured, getting stranded when they head out into the back country unprepared or unaware of the conditions. On summer weekends the SARs never get a break, the calls just keep on coming and often one lost or injured person will have to wait their turn to be rescued, have to wait until a SAR team has finished its current mission. Then there are the climbers on the Chief, that big 2000ft high granite monolith that sits right by the highway at the south end of town. (For the life of my I can’t figure out why they’d put a big cliff right beside a highway where it can attract all sorts of people). We tend to lose 2 or 3 climbers per season and this year is right on track. About 6 weeks ago a climber fell when he leaned back, only to find he was not tied off. That didn’t end so good and it tied up a SAR team and a helicopter for hours as they tried to retrieve his body. Then this past weekend another one fell to his death as he lead a group of climbers up a popular section of cliff face. Again, the SARs were tied up for hours as they attempted to extract the body. The fallers don’t tend to land in convenient locations but get jammed into some rock crevice somewhere below where they fell from, and that can still be a long way up. The number of climbers who fall a short distance and end up badly hurt is too high keep track of, just like the number of back country hikers who get into trouble.

The news media then interviews other climbers who all say the same thing, that being: “we are a tight nick community and everyone knows everyone and we all feel badly BUT its all part of the game and we all know the risks and things like this happen”. Some of them will actually smirk a bit as if its some king of big joke. Then, once the authorities have cleared out, up they all go again.

Now, I have no problem with the concept of people taking personal risks, but, they are putting a constant strain on the SAR teams. With the exception of the military team out of Comox who are paid professionals, the SARs are all volunteers, giving up they free time to look for lost people, rescue lost or injured people, and extract bodies from cliff faces. The partakers of the extreme sports are cavalier about it while the SARs are burning out. Some of the North Shore SAR teams have special structures in strategic locations through out the back country where they stash rescue gear and equipment so it will be available when needed. But unbelievably, they are constantly finding the storage structures have been vandalized and the equipment stollen. There are way too many people on this planet who hale from the shallow end of the gene pool.

Now, getting back to the usual statement that they “know what they are doing and except the risks”…. Using that logic shouldn’t someone driving down a public highway (climbers and hikers are on public land) speeding along at about twice the speed limit, be able to tell the hypothetical cop that has just pulled them over that they “know what they are doing and understand the risks” and simply be let off, no charges, no nothing, scot-free. Its basically the same thing. At least thats how I see it.

doug
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From Russ

Not a lot going on - Oh yeah?

This is not about ticks as promised, but about a lot of things going on here at Point Clark.
A little, old Lady I’ve known for some 68 years (she’s 98), owns a vacant lot next to my property, and another lot on which her very old cottage stands. It’s Lake front property and valued at around a million. She’s a bit ‘different’ to say the least, and a “tree hugger” as well. She will not cut down any tree, even if it’s sick and dying – she’ll prop it up somehow until it eventually dies, then she’ll have more trees planted to take it’s place until you can’t see her cottage for trees! The sun never breaks through, so nothing grows – but she keeps on planting more young trees!! She once called the Police and told them her neighbour is poisoning her trees, and that’s why they keep dying. It could be true, because the neighbour loved to torment her – all because of her obsession with her precious trees!

There has been an infestation of the “Emerald Ash Borer” which has killed most of the mature Ash trees in Ontario, and this area in Point Clark, which was beautifully treed with Ash, some reaching heights of 100 feet, and some as old as 100 years have had to be cut down for safety reasons, and in an attempt to stop the spread of the devastation.
I’ve lost 17 large Ash trees already, and there are still more to be cut down.
We’ve been after Anne (a.m. little, old lady) for years to have her dead and dangerous Ash trees cut down, she always promises to “attend to the matter next time she’s up” (she lives in TO), but never does. She’s had written notice that her trees pose an imminent danger to her neighbours on both the North (me) and the South (Cameron’s) sides of her vacant, jungle-like lot. I live in fear each time the wind blows from her direction that a 20 Ton tree will come crashing down on my cottage with me in it! That’s it! I’ve had enough!

Anne has a nephew living in Kincardine to whom she has given her consent to “look after her property”, with the result we now have “written consent” to enter upon her property and cut down 4 dead Ash trees that pose the threat.
I hired John, an arborist (Out On A Limb Tree Service) to do his thing. He looked over the job, gave me a written estimate, and said he’d start with the “easiest” one (the one which the Pileated Woodpecker had riddled with 30+ large holes as noted in a previous Squamidian).

Dropping it was the easy part – when John tried to retrieve some of his equipment, he was attacked by a swarm of honey bees, and was stung several times before he was able to make his get-away! Getting away is not fast, and definitely not easy, as the floor of this swampy jungle is beset with downed tree limbs, tall weeds, and years of accumulation of dead leaves. Tripping and falling is a ‘given’! I might mention here that in the Spring melt, or after every heavy rainfall, the swamp acquires 2 small but deep ponds which remain for months making an excellent breeding place for mosquitoes. John returned several times over a two day period to continue with his project, only to be driven back by swarms of bees.

We contacted a ‘Bee keeper’ in the area named Josh, Vice President of Anderkin Foods Inc.,  who came quickly along with a helper, chainsaw, smoker, sprayer and wearing ‘bee-proof attire’ (all necessary gear for the safety of the men) They saw no evidence of a nest in the lower trunk of the tree, but quickly found a huge nest in the upper part of the 75 – 80 foot tree.  Josh used his smoker to pacify the bees, then his chainsaw to cut a 5 foot ‘chunk’ from the trunk containing the beehive. His helper plugged all the holes so no bees could escape (but many did), and they carried the 200 pound log to their truck, removed their protective gear and drove off leaving their Stihl chainsaw behind!
Josh had earlier instructed me to wait until dusk, then spray the remaining bees with a special stuff to kill the bees on contact.
“Greg, I’m looking for a ‘brave soul’ to spray the bees tonight, do you know who I might contact?”
“I’ll come down and do it”, said the ‘brave soul’.
Now Greg, who is terrified of spiders and wasps and hornets and BEES, had to ‘gear-up’ for the episode; he brought an old rain suit, bright yellow, he wore while working on an oil-drilling platform in the North Sea off Scotland several years ago, and he had ‘saved it’ in case he was ever called back to work on an oil rig on some ocean – which never happened. Sad.
“Can I help?” I asked, (knowing I am useless). While duct-taping his pants into his big, heavy, high boots, he replied,
“You can duct-tape my cuffs”  as he pulled on some heavy leather work-gloves.
“Where’s the old beekeeper’s hood we used to have around here?”
“It’s around here somewhere” I replied, as we both started looking around in the garage where all this preparation was taking place. Greg quickly found it and pulled it over his head, I tucked the bottom of the hood into the top of the rain suit, and we’re all set to do some serious bee killing! I had to stifle a laugh as he walked off carrying a can of spray in one hand and a large spotlight in the other. He looked like he was about to walk on the moon!

Picture this: It’s nearly dark; Greg is moving very slowly as he tries not to disturb the estimated 5000 bees that have all snuggled up together, afraid because they’ve lost their precious Queen. Moving is tough, moving quietly is impossible! He stumbles over the fallen branches making crashing noises with his large leather boots, and UGH! UGH!
noises with his ‘ugh – er’. I have to give him credit as he didn’t fall fully to the ground -  the ‘jungle floor wouldn’t allow it! ( only wish I could have recorded this!). He finally got close enough to see the bees he was to dispatch. But the damned beekeepers hood kept slipping down over his face so he couldn’t see a thing! I tried not to laugh out loud. He sprayed the gang of bees hiding in one end of the hollow tree until the can was nearly empty, then he crashed out of the entanglement and rapidly headed for the safety of the garage about 60 feet away where we ripped off the duct tape in a panic, allowing for his ‘release’ and the reward of a cold beer. A job well done – right? Wrong. This morning the remaining bees were viciously protecting their hollow log, thus preventing John to commence with his work. And what about the hive that had occupied the lower trunk? They followed their Queen and were now clinging to a branch on a nearby Maple tree – but standing in the way of progress!
 
John will come back tomorrow (Friday) and climb the next Ash to be cut down, and cut a branch that may hit the Maple tree thus set off another swarming. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!
 
By your old Uncle Russ.
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From ‘The Wife’

As some of you already know, I am notorious for losing things (credit cards, keys, glasses, wallets and so on) which does not really work with a spouse who knows where all his valuables are at all times.

Back in late June, I was babysitting in Maple Ridge. I had dropped the girls off at school (Kyra) and daycare (Olivia) and then headed to Tim Hortons for a coffee. I did some shopping and headed back to Lauren & Ryan’s place after that. I had lunch and did a few things, then settled down to play Sudoka on my phone until it was time to pick up the girls just before 4pm. I got their snacks ready and headed down to the car. No keys to be found, so the frantic search began as I obviously had not only driven there but had gotten into their condo. ….No keys anywhere!

NOW WHAT?  I called BCAA who sent a gentleman in a tow truck who opened my locked car as I thought I must have locked them in the trunk. NO keys anywhere in the vehicle.  (They were willing to tow me to Squamish but that wasn’t going to work.) I called Lauren at work, about 45 minutes away and her boss let her leave early so that she could pick up the girls and I phoned Day Care to let them know what was happening.

When Lauren and the girls got home we both did a very through search again… no luck. Worse case scenario was that the keys had been left in the door and someone took them (stuff like that has happened in Maple Ridge to facilitate a break in later) I not only had my car key, our mailbox key and house key on the ring but also Ryan & Lauren’s condo key. 
I filed a police report.

I then had to call a very unhappy Doug in Squamish to bring the spare keys down to Maple Ridge (1.5-2 hour drive). Ryan phoned as he had just landed in Vancouver and we told him the story so he bought a new lock set for his front door on the way home. Ryan changed the lock on the door. Doug went home and I stayed overnight as I was too stressed to drive.

Two days later Doug and I got replacement keys cut.

Fast forward to July 23rd when I noticed that my prescription glasses were missing. Here we go again…. Ripped the house apart, checked outside in the flowerbeds I had been working in… no luck. Next morning, Doug said he would check at the Gondola and I went to the grocery store, Shoppers Drug and Canadian Tire to see if glasses had been turned in.
Doug sent me a text about 9:30am with a picture asking if these glasses were mine. YES!!

Then, a few days ago, Ryan called to say he was cleaning his garage and found my keys on the floor under his toolbox.

ALL IS NOW RIGHT WITH MY WORLD!!! (The Wife)
for now
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From Lorne

Confession time.  I just bought my 4th flat of strawberries. A total of 24 liters. Cindy took about 4 liters and I ate the rest raw on cereal or froze them. I'm only commenting on my glutinous craving because Doug hasn't even seen a strawberry this season. We, Gale, Carol and I went blueberry picking last Wed. Second time for Gale and I. Assigned a row, Gale began on one side and I on the other. The 1st bush more than filled my 4 liter basket. Abundance is the only way to describe it.

In other events, the new car to-day reached 1000 ks. Beating Gale's 2 year old new car by about 640k by last reading.  She even drove both times for blueberry picking.

Lorne

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THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone!
Hope you enjoyed your long weekend this past week! The weather here in KW was amazing and we certainly enjoyed every minute of it. For the most part, we just stayed around home and did whatever needed to be done around the house but at least, it wasn’t done in the rain!

Anyway, lately I’ve been taking walks around the block each morning instead of spending half an hour on the treadmill and I find it very relaxing to be walking out doors instead of in the basement. The only difference is that the walk around our considerable block varies from flat surface to downhill and then up hill for the last half km. I find that I have to take my time and walk the uphill part slower of course than the rest of the walk but I’ve been able to do it and it’s getting easier each time I do. So, that’s what I call progress!
*
If you’re old enough to remember a folk singer by the name of Arlo Guthrie, then you might remember a song entitled “Dead Skunk In The Middle Of The Road” that was made famous by him in the late 60’s!

You can Google it if you’re interested in bringing back some 60’s memories!
The reason I mention it is because three days ago when I was starting out on my 8am walk around the block, I stepped out of our house and noticed a distinct odour in the air. It was the smell of a skunk and it was strong indeed. I looked around a bit and finally saw the body of what looked to be a smaller sized skunk lying in the middle of the road. It was on the crosswalk at our corner but had obviously made it only half way across the street before getting hit by a vehicle of some sort! I went over to it and looked at it with thought of removing it and tossing it into the hydro right of way out back but decided against it. I didn’t want to stink up one of my shovels and then have to clean the shovel some how. As most of you know, the smell of skunk is very difficult to get rid of in any way. So I left the little critter where he fell. I figured he’d be squashed into nothing within a day. However, it seemed that every vehicle that turned the corner missed his little body and for two days he was still relatively intact! After that few days, Carole and I were sitting on the front porch enjoying an afternoon tea and suddenly, something caught our eye again on the street. It was two huge “Turkey Buzzards” and I do mean HUGE! Their wingspan as they landed on the street was at least 5 feet in width! They had detected the smell of the dead skunk and decided to drop in for lunch! One of them grabbed the dead skunk and dragged it onto the lawn of the Jerk that lives across the street from us. You may remember my account of that neighbour being a loud-mouthed jerk a few years ago. Well, the dead skunk on his lawn looked good to us but of course it didn’t stay there very long. The two huge buzzards made quick work of eating the little guy over the next 15 minutes. It’s amazing how quickly these birds consumed him. They pecked and munched away at him literally tearing him to bite sized pieces. I decided to get my camera and see if I could take some good pics of these interesting birds. When I went in to get the camera one of them flew away, I guess he’d had enough to eat! I tried to sneak up on the other one to get a good shot of Mother Nature in action but I could only get within about 50 feet. The pics turned out to be too distant for any detail but at least I got a photo record of the event! When a few of the neighbours saw me taking pictures of the big bird, they decided to take some too and with a bunch of people approaching the bird, he got spooked and flew away. He only made it far enough to land on our rooftop. I got a couple of pictures of him sitting atop our house but again; they were too distant for detail. Oh well, at least the two big birds and the little skunk gave me something to write about this week! I’d like to thank Mother Nature for her inspiration and for sending two of her custodians to clean up the little stinker that should have looked both ways before crossing our street but didn’t! LOL!

That’s about all for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!
Bye for now … Greg
PS: Something To Think About>
Every time you cross a street, be sure to look both ways or you might wind up as dinner for a couple of buzzards!

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Have a good one..
the doug
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