The Squamidian Report – Sept. 1 / 18
Issue #849
Including:
From Russ
The Ontarion
Hi All,
And just like that, summers over......
One day last week the temperature here hit a sizzling 35.2, accompanied
with thick smoke making it very unpleasant. Two days later it was
overcast with a few showers and the temp maxed out at a chilly 14.
There's simply no way of adjusting that fast to that degree of change.
And the long range forecast is for temperatures tending to be below
normal, so, summers over. But thats ok, I prefer cooler weather, easier
to breath, easier to exist. When its too hot you can't even go out on
the motorcycle. When its on the cooler side you can always layer up and
ride to your heart's content.
Some of you are familiar with the section of our Sea to Sky highway
between Britannia and Furry Creek. It climbs up over a high ridge that
sits between the two places, both places being down at or near, sea
level. The section north from Furry Creek is long straight and fairly
steep, almost like a gigantic drag strip set on an angle. The section
that drops down into Britannia when heading north is just as steep if
not steeper but has several very tight switch-backs. The driving lanes
are contained within concrete barriers to keep out of control vehicles
from venturing into on coming traffic. So, when heading southbound out
of Britannia, you climb up through those switch-backs. That section of
roadway is posted at 60K for good reason. Many drivers don't seem to be
able to make those tight curves, either headed up or down, when going
much faster than that although traffic is constantly doing so because
if you don't do 80 you will get rear ended.
We had a situation last week where a tractor trailer unit came down the
hill northbound way too fast and ended up taking out about 75 meters of
barrier and then sliding another 75 or so on its side. That had the
road shut down for a while. But mostly the problems start when road
rocket type motorcycles race up the hill, leaning way over through the
curves pretending they running some pro circuit. Durning the summer we
lose about 2 of those morons per week. Even though its 60K through
Britannia and on up to the top of the hill they accelerate out of the
light by the village and race like hell up the hill, inevitably one or
more of them losing it on either the first or second curve. Then of
course traffic ends up stopped while the authorities pick up the
pieces. Frustrating for everyone, including the rest of the biking
world as it gives everyone a bad name.
Anyway, I've now explained the hill in order to set the scene for what
happened a few days ago. There is a company in West Van that has a
fleet of high end powerful sports cars that they rent out to people who
want to drive the Sea to Sky highway while experiencing it from the
seat of a hot car. They charge rather high rates yet seem to have no
end of customers, usually the adult offspring of the very well-to-do.
Over the last few years they've had various makes and models, I assume
they lease them and then return them for a different make or model.
Here is their current lineup, well, as of a week ago.
Scenic Rush.
LAMBORGHINI GALLARDO LP560-4
FERRARI F430 SPIDER
AUDI R8
CORVETTE C7 Z06
Last fall they lost a Lamborghini up the highway at BOB when it went up
in flames while stopped in traffic. Assumably the driver was revving
the engine and Lamborghini's don't like to have their engines revved
when there is no external airflow. Scenic Rush replaced that unit with
a nice new neon green unit.
Well, the group of hot cars had been up to Whistler and were headed
back down the highway. As so many young adrenaline crazed drivers do,
they raced out of the light in
Britannia. The Lamborghini driver didn't quite make it all the way up
through the switch-backs. He lost it on the last tight curve and hit
the concrete barriers hard enough to move them. One more Lamborghini
written off. Neon green bits of car all over the place. We went by just
as the cops got there. I don't know what story the driver gave the cop
but I do know both of us got a chuckle out of seeing that nice shiny
expensive car all crumpled and broken because of the idiot behind the
wheel. Face it, its human nature to laugh at someone else's misfortune
when that someone else seems to have so much more to laugh at. The
people who rent those cars are responsible for ALL incurred costs, such
as traffic tickets and any damage. If that guy doesn't have sufficient
or correct coverage, he's on the hook for the cost of replacement.
Again, chuckle chuckle.
doug
****
From Russ
Before I begin my usual column, please allow me to tell you why “I’m
still bubbling-over” with excitement. Early Thursday morning as I was
exiting my bath, my phone was ‘running-over’, so leaped to answer same
while still dripping; it was my good friend Greg Payne;
“Hi Russ, it’s Greg...you got anything on today?”
No, not thing, as a matter of fact I’m stark naked and dripping wet.
“Sorry about that, but Carole had something going on here, and I’d
‘just be in the way’, so I thought I’d take a drive up your way and
show you the MG”
Wonderful! When can I expect you?
“Before noon, for sure”
Great, we’ll have lunch together...can’t wait to see your ‘sweetheart’.
It’s noon hour, I’m sitting out on my deck, and into my drive comes a
cute little green car. Greg had sent me pictures so I knew what to
expect, but up close and personal it’s even more appealing! It was
great to see Greg, but I couldn’t take my eyes off the tiny MG...it
looks like it’d just come off the showroom floor...it even smelled like
a new car once I got inside! Greg explained all the work he’d done
himself; basically the whole new interior. We HAD to go for a ride
immediately, so headed for the local restaurant, taking the “scenic
route”. It rides kind of ‘hard’ and the gravel road is full of
potholes, so not a good idea to traverse.
Lake Range Family Restaurant is famous for it’s hamburgers, so having
enjoyed them myself I recommended Greg try one. He ordered,
“I’ll have a hamburger with the works”
Words can’t properly describe how Greg looked as he chomped-down on his
very thick, very juicy burger! With stuff dripping from his chin, and
the occasional chunk coming my way, he tried to carry on a
conversation. And he always has a lot of good, tasty things to say!
After a good, long lunch, we drove to the Point Clark Lighthouse, a 160
year-old tourist attraction, then to visit my nephew, Dickson Cummings
who has a ‘gentleman’s farm in my neighbourhood. He also has a fully
restored 1954, Mercury “Indi-pace-car” (hope I got that right).
Needless to say, these ‘antique car buffs’ showed-off their respective
‘toys’ and had quite a lot so say about each other’s ‘hobbies’.
Thanks, Greg, for the great ‘treat’.....You made my day. It was sad to
see the little MG drive away. It was born in England in 1979. It
bears personalized plates # R WEE B (are wee baby) the ‘wee’
reflecting Carole’s Irish background.
The only thing I’m going to mention today relative to my police background is;
“We’ll ban all handguns and assault rifles in Canada” says our leader,
“But, excepting ‘all lawful’ users”.
I got news for you, Justin....”unlawful handguns” are already
prohibited by the Criminal Code, and assault rifles are not allowed for
game hunting in any province of Canada. Assault rifles are designed as
‘anti-personnel’ weapons of War, and not “lawful for any purpose” in
Canada.
Next week we’ll “exhume” some more interesting/humorous stories from the early days of Police Training in KPD and beyond.
Russ.
****
THE ONTARION REPORT
Hello everyone!
Here we are starting September already and I’m still not used to the
fact that’s its summer! LOL! Guess we’ve been so busy with the MG
and stuff that summer has zipped by with great speed. Oh well,
apparently we’re in for a lovely Fall according to the farmers of
Ontario. I hope that Fall lasts well into December this year so that
winter is short and sweet! On Thursday Carole had lots to do and didn’t
need me hanging around the house so I decided to take a drive to
Amberly on Lake Huron to visit Doug’s uncle Russ. I called him around
8am and asked if he would be home for the day and he said he had no
plans. I told him I’d be up to see him around noon as it is about a two
hour drive from here to his place. It was an opportunity to take a good
long drive in the MG and I had looked forward to testing the integrity
of the new roof at highway speeds. As it turned out, the roof is still
intact and didn’t blow off at highway speeds so that’s a good thing!
LOL! Russ was thrilled with the look of the MG and it was the first
time he’d seen it in person and had a ride in it. We drove over to the
local restaurant to have some lunch shortly after I arrived at his
place. It’s just a little place with a few tables but it’s quiet and
comfortable so we almost had the whole place to ourselves. This allowed
us to have a good long chat about life and other things and enjoy
a good lunch as well.
Afterwards we visited Russ’s nephew at his “Gentleman’s farm” as Russ
calls it. It’s just a few acres of land with a house and a couple of
out buildings and some chickens roaming in the yard. It’s a nice place
and only a few blocks from Russ’s place in Amberley. We visited
“Dickson” at his place and he showed us has classic car after he had a
good look at the MG. He’s into classic vehicles and really appreciated
the condition of our MG. His pride and joy is a 1959 Mercury
convertible that was the “Indy 500” pace car for that year! It’s a huge
light yellow convertible that’s in beautiful condition for the year. He
said he picked it up almost 50 years ago for only $200.00. He has since
had it gone over mechanically as well as had it repainted back in 2013
and it’s beautiful indeed! It’s of course huge when compared to the MG.
It’s about 20 or more feet long and the MG is only a little more than
half that length! LOL! It was interesting to see and we talked cars for
over an hour. As it was getting on into late afternoon I had to drop
Russ off at home and start my drive back to Kitchener. It takes about
two and a half hours to make the drive home from the lake Huron
shoreline. By the time I got home it was 6:30pm and time to have some
supper. The day was a success and Russ and I had a nice visit as usual
and talked about the many things we have in common. It’s amazing how
many interesting things two old guys like us have to talk about and
once again we could have talked for many more hours if I had had the
time to spend away from home. LOL! I’m sure we’ll get to visit again
soon and we’ll still have loads to talk about then as well!
I look forward to our next visit and it’ll give me more to write about at that point as well!
Thanks for the fun afternoon Russ and we’ll do it again soon!
That’s about all for this week!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!
Bye for now… Greg
PS: Something To Think About>
If you want to learn something new, spend a few hours talking with
someone much older than you are! You’d be amazed at the history they
have to pass on!
****
Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.
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