The Squamidian Report – Feb. 10/18

Issue #820
Including:

From Sus
From Lorne
More Stink From Russ
The Ontarion

Hi All,

My Martin guitar (not to be confused with the pine martin eating little critters up at the gondola) is my pride and joy but I've always thought the strings were about half a mm too high. They were dead on as far as the Martin factory settings go but the tactile feel through my fingers said they could be just a hair lower. It had been my intention to put on a new set of strings after getting back from Ontario and that is of course the time to adjust the string hight, given that the strings must be removed in order to shave a bit off the bottom edge of the saddle. The saddle is that little strip of white plastic or bone (bone on 'better' guitars) that is set into the bridge, where the strings sit, just above where they are anchored. Saddles on most guitars are not fastened down, they are held in their slot by the pressure of the strings and therefore quite easy to remove.

So, with the old strings off I removed the saddle and carefully measured and marked the saddle. The thing to remember is that a full mm removed from the saddle will lower the strings ½ mm at the 12^th fret. Its important to mark the saddle so as not to go too far when sanding. I laid a sheet of fine sand paper on the table and carefully moved the saddle across the paper, checking often, until I was at my mark, then popped the saddle back into its grove and installed new strings. The new strings now sit nice and low, not so low as to cause buzzing, wouldn't want that, but nice and low. There are a benefits in having low strings. For starters, you don't need to push them down as far to fret them and therefore you don't push them minutely out of tune when fretting. Same goes for using a capo, the strings aren't deflected as far as high strings so intonation stays much closer to true. As well, low strings are easy on the fingers so the guitar is easier to play. This guitar was always easy to play, now its even easier. And this perhaps leads to the next segment.

*

Well now, its been just short of a year but I've finally found that spark or drive or creative place or all three of them. Whatever it is, or however it is, I've finally written another song. My recording and document files for the last one were sealed on March 3/17. I have no idea why I've not been able to 'get in the mood' or whatever it takes since then, and certainly hope the next one isn't another year away. This current composition was inspired by the fact we've had two full moons in January. Both were 'super moons', being a bit closer to the Earth in their orbit and therefore measurably brighter than what would be considered normal. But, its not a scientific song, just an ordinary song, song.

Perhaps the fact that Ryan coerced me to abandon GarageBand and move up to Logic as my recording and mixing software helped put me in the mood. As it was, I barley scratched the surface in GarageBand as to what it can do. Kinda like using a computer to total up a few numbers, over-kill big time. GarageBand is the 'lite' version of Logic, and Logic apparently has much higher grade filters, plugins and so on, assuming you can figure out how to find, let alone use them. The Logic interface is, or at least can be, very similar to GarageBand, but even in its most simplistic version still has many more items, choices, menus etc. So I'm not just struggling with being out of practice at song writing and recording, I'm struggling a bit with the actual act of recording. Face it, I'm rusty. The attempt at writing felt like starting over, felt like it did when I tried writing my first song or two. Trying to organize and do the arranging was difficult, distracting. However, it came together for better or worse. As usual, I've uploaded it to my web site and this link below should open and play it. The song is called 'Full Moon Tonight'. Hope you enjoy it.

http://www.thedougsite.net/Songs/Lyrics/Full%20Moon%20Tonight.mp3

doug

****

From Sus

Speaking of favourite breakfast places, everyone should have one. I love going out for breakfast, then starting my day in town to do all my one day a week shopping. Living in the country makes you very organized. It doesn't make sense to drive a half hour each way to do one thing.

Getting back to breakfast, we love a little diner in Westville called, Barb's diner and so do all the locals. So if you time it just right, the regulars, and I mean daily people are leaving and freeing up some space. We are not from Westville but everyone is so friendly and greet you as you arrive. The diner is named after Barb who is an 80 year old lady who started the business and can be seen off and on putting in some time waitressing. The walls are decorated with photos of family, friends and events from the past. And best of all the food is amazing. They not only serve a terrific breakfast but lunch and dinners too. Just recently they started closing on Monday and Tuesdays just to give them a break so we had to change our town day to Wednesdays. That's how dedicated we are.

I think most small towns have their great little diners where all the locals go, you just have to find it. So if you are ever out this way, you won't want to miss Barb's.

Sus

****

From Lorne

Some loyal followers of The Squad are concerned and are asking about the ways of the wayward clock on the wall. Well, there are no recent wayward ways. It, the clock, has been respectfully running forward for quit some time. 'The time' being about 12 and a 1/2 days behind. The dull truth is that I am not able to reach the damn thing to set it right. There, now you're sorry you asked. In other mundane topics, the tractor is back and running. My service man fashioned a wooden plug for the filler opening. It has stopped the flow of oil and the engine runs OK, pleasing my descendants no end. With snow falling at this moment, I plan a blow near noon to-day.

Lorne

****

More Stink From Russ

Some of my ‘fellow Squamidians’ have encouraged me to continue with my essay on “smells that trigger memories”, so as promised here we go with Segment #3: printer’s ink, and coal oil.

“printer’s ink” As an 11 year-old in Centreville, I had myself a paper route, only it was magazines ......”Liberty” (are they still in print?).

My customers were few and far between, the route took me from my home, all the way down to the Freeport Sanatorium.....a long walk for skinny me! But, I must add here that I had a very kind lady en route, who always gave me a cold drink and a warm smile...her name was Mrs. Krug, of Krug Furniture. We kids thought they were millionaires...they lived in a ‘mansion’ on a bluff overlooking the Grand River near Freeport. I always kind of dreaded going into the ‘San’, because it ‘smelled funny’ and TB was ‘contagious’(we thought, so I held my breath as long as I could!). The patients were either lying in hospital beds in their rooms or on cots placed ‘out in the cold’, because “their cure depended largely on breathing fresh cold air”. They might have been ‘sick’, but they were VERY kind, as sometimes I would get a ‘tip’, maybe a nickel or even a dime! That was “big money” for me because the Liberty guy paid me only 2 cents for delivering a magazine selling for 25 cents. He kept my interest by giving me cheap little ‘gifts’.

“A reward for your hard work and honesty”, he would say. Sucker me.

But, I digress. The Liberty really smelled good! Any new magazine smells good to me even to this day! Eaton’s and Simpson’s catalogues smelt so nice, that after the whole family was done reading/sniffing them, we didn’t throw them away (no recycling back then), they were relegated to the ‘out-house’ (for further reading only), the glossy paper is NOT recommended for any ‘other’ use.

The daily newspaper (now, almost a thing of the past), if you were lucky enough to be the first to open it, also smelt nice. It was my ‘old friend’, printer’s ink, I presume. Note: Also not recommended as a ‘replacement for real TP, but “will do in a pinch!”.

Finally, on the smell of newspaper my thoughts go back to when you bought ‘fish & chips’, they were always wrapped in newspapers.

How many of you remember the ‘inkwells’ in our wooden school desks; pen-nibs that ‘spritzed’; blotters that soaked up those large spills before they completely spoiled our books, papers, desk, clothes, etc.; the Gestetner Machine for making ‘copies’ long before photo copiers were invented? Keeping those tabletop, hand-crank operated ‘ink guzzlers’ was a messy full-time job for the teacher’s pet.

“coal oil” The Brubacher family, for a short while lived in a settlement on the Grand River, called “Riverbank”(fitting), and for some reason which I never understood, the electricity had been ‘cut off’ shortly after we moved in. Was it ‘condemned’? Could we not afford it? Lorne would know. He was already a “working man with a girlfriend” at that time, but no car.

We had no choice but to use coal oil lamps and coal oil stove. Why did my hands always smell of coal oil? Maybe it was my job to keep the lamps filled. One night when our parents were away (and Lorne was out with his girlfriend), one of us kids was carrying a lighted lamp up the stairs at bedtime, when it was accidentally dropped, spilling burning oil down the wooden steps!! We were terrified! Somehow we put out the flames before they really set the steps on fire.

“How many times have we told you NOT TO CARRY Lighted lamps?!” I think they were more relieved than angry, but we sure learned a lesson! Did the landlord ever find out why the stairwell was blackened? Did we ‘cover it up with paint to destroy the evidence’? Lorne would know, I’ll ask him next time I see him....which isn’t often enough!

Coal oil had many uses in our family back then; as a ‘medicine’ when we had a bad cold/cough. A teaspoonful of sugar was ‘laced’ with a few drops of coal oil, and forced into our innocent, open, young mouths...YUCK!!

Coal oil as a ‘pest control’. Pop (as we called our dad when we got older/braver) would wrap some old rags around a stick, soak the rags in coal oil, set a match to it, and use the ‘flaming torch’ to burn caterpillar nests in our young fruit trees....”instant roasted caterpillars”. Some people actually eat them! Apparently they are considered very high in ‘protein’.

We hope these stories will bring back memories you might wish to share. Next week, we feature; tar, rain, and fresh earth.

Remember; your nose knows more than you’ll ever know!

By ‘house-bound’ Uncle Russ.

****

THE ONTARION REPORT

Hello everyone!

Well, it’s snowing outside right now and it sounds and looks like we’re in for another blast of winter fury! Oh well, that’s what Canada is all about this time of year. The plow just went by and filled in the driveway for the second time this evening. Guess I’ll leave it until morning and I know it’s going to be a chore but watching Adam work with the snow blower isn’t all that taxing! LOL! It’s something I can easily do from the comfort of our living room and I hardly get winded at all! Maybe next year I’ll be on the end of the TORO once again and Adam can come over and watch me blow the snow. On the other hand he’ll likely be using his own TORO on his own property and he can take a video of that to show me! I guess we’ve all got our own chores to look after when we’re homeowners.

On the other hand, do they even call it “making a video” anymore? With all the new fangled gadgets out these days, it’s hard to keep up with what they call what. Elon Musk managed to send his own Tesla convertible sports car into space the other day and it even has a spaceman driving it. It was launched from his private rocket about 25 miles (I think) above the earth and is headed for Mars. Hard to believe that such a stunt is even possible! It won’t be long before he’ll be sending paying passengers for trips to outer space (and back to earth) for an afternoon ride. Even if I could afford such a venture I don’t think I’d want to experience that. Things are thrilling enough right here on good ol’ planet Earth! Just take a drive in the local traffic at around 5pm any weekday and you’ll know what I mean. I wonder what Eurie Gagarin and John Glenn would think of today’s space adventures? Speaking of the space race, do any of you remember when the Russians launched “Sputnik” the satellite back in the 50’s? I was just a kid but I remember that happening. All of a sudden the stores were filled with “Sputnik” lamps and furniture that looked like something from “The Jetson’s” TV show and that was before the Jetsons were even on TV. People thought the creators of the adventures of Buck Rogers were nothing but dreamers and that such a thing as a Dick Tracey communicator watch would never happen and now look what you can have in your very own home! I remember when I first started on the Fire Dept and we would respond to a fire call at the University of Waterloo to their computer lab. They were one of the first universities to have a computer system and started teaching their students how to use and program computers. The computer they had was a single computer that was housed in a 3000 square foot room and was operated by several huge terminals dispersed throughout the university. The room contained dozens of processors the size of large refrigerators with 18” diameter reels of tape on each one! Every time the alarm went off the room filled with a non-flammable gas from a sprinkler system so that actual fire was impossible. We would respond and had to wear SCBA (Self Contained Breathing Apparatus) just to enter the building! Once inside and checked to find the cause of the alarm we would activate a vacuum system that would suck all the gas out of the room and blow it into the atmosphere through the roof of the building. The gas was of course replaced by normal breathing air and the programmers that ran the place could restart the computer system. It’s hard to believe that today you can wear a watch on your wrist that has more power than that room full of computer equipment had! I guess that’s progress!

When Russ was talking about smells bringing back memories it made me think of sounds doing the same thing. When I was about 10 years old I asked “Santa” for a transistor radio for Christmas and that was THE most advanced gadget of it’s time as far as kids were concerned. I got my wish fulfilled on Christmas day! Santa left me a beautiful red 6 transistor radio complete with one earpiece and it was about the size of a normal shirt pocket. I listened to that radio for months and even years on end. I think I had it until I was around 15 years of age and it even went to bed with me each night. Of course it was a challenge just to keep a good battery in the device. In those days batteries didn’t last like they do today and it ran on a single 9-volt battery. For a tiny radio I was amazed at the number of stations I could receive on it and the incredible range it had for picking up distant radio stations. I used to listen to what quickly became my favourite station. It was WLS in Chicago and the announcer’s name was Dick Beyondy. I’m not sure of the spelling of the last name but I heard a while ago that he recently passed away and was one of the most well known and listened to radio personalities in North America. He could talk faster than anyone I’d ever heard and was THE coolest DJ on the air. When I think of him, I think of my transistor radio and wish I still had it. No doubt it would still be working.

I’m not sure what ever happened to it but it’s gone the way of the Dodo for sure! I haven’t seen a radio like it for at least 50 years. I may just keep my eyes open the next time I’m in an antique shop and who knows, maybe they can still be had from such a source. It would be fun just to see if I can still locate one of that size and from that era! Who knows, maybe there’s a company that’s producing replicas of radios from back then. I’ve seen tabletop radios in the antique shops but they are either short wave units or they are not working. I never thought at the time about the little pocket sized one that I had but now that I’ve been reminded I’ll have to keep my eyes open for one. I’m sure you all remember Clyde Gilmour who was a friend of mine and also a friend to Doug and other family members, well; he had a nice collection of early tabletop radios that he kept on shelves in his office at home. Most of them were made of early plastic called “Bakelite”. Bakelite was one of the first forms of plastic and the only fault with it was that it would dry out and become brittle after a number of years and if you weren’t careful with it the slightest bump would make it crack or even shatter. Luckily someone invented a better form or resilient plastic that is used endlessly today! Unfortunately, today’s plastic is virtually indestructible and is becoming a major pollution problem for our landfills and oceans around the world. Maybe that invention wasn’t so lucky after all! Hopefully someone will invent a use for used plastic and stop the pollution problem before it’s too late!

Surely there must be some way of recycling plastic bottles etc that would help solve the problem! I’ve seen floor mats and even duvet covers that people make out of plastic grocery bags and they say they are very warm. A few years ago those bags were becoming a problem and now companies are making useful products out of the used bags. Now there’s a challenge for you would be inventers out there! Come up with a use for plastic bottles of all kinds! Maybe companies can start making houses out of the two liter sized plastic bottles, after all, there are now homes being built in the warmer states of the USA that are made out of glass bottles and even used car tires! So why not melt the plastic bottles down and make building materials out of them? Hey, maybe Elon Musk can start sending loads of earth’s refuse out into space! I’m sure there is lots of room for landfill sites on Mars! Food for thought!

That’s about it for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next time in The Ontarion Report

Bye for now … Greg

PS: Something (more) To Think About>

Isn’t there an election coming up? In my opinion this “father/son” Prime Minister thing is something to stay away from next time and I’m not so sure having a “father/daughter” duo of Prime Ministers would be any better! After all, Brian Mulroney turned out to be a dud PM even if he was with the RIGHT party! Would his daughter be any better?

****
Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.