The Squamidian Report – Nov. 28 / 15
Issue #705
Including:
The Ontarion
Hi All,
Well thats a bummer... based on earlier forecasts I was going to be
able to write about our first real hit of winter. Last weekend we were
under a 'special weather statement' that was warning us about an
imminent snow and cold event. An Arctic Outflow was going to collide
with wet Pacific air and the results were supposed to happen during the
first part of the week. The forecast indicated lots of snow right out
to the coast and even Vancouver and area was supposed to have some
accumulations. Thats the kind of forecast that sends west coasters into
a frenzied panic. Never happened. Well, the forecasted weather never
happened, the panic did. The weather statement was dropped, the rain
went away and all we got for our troubles was a whole bunch of nice
clear sunny days, and a lot of wind. So yes in a way, there was stuff
on the roads but it was leaves and branches, not snow or ice. What is
very accurately predictable is the behavior of the coastal drivers when
a snow event is expected. They all go running to their nearest tire
store to make an appointment to have winter tires installed. That
generally means a backed up waiting time of a couple of weeks for many
of them. The expected storm would have been long since over but perhaps
they would be in time for the next one but that would mean they were
planning ahead and no one does that. Many of those panicked drivers
will actually cancel their tire order on the logic that perhaps winter
will pass us by again, until the next storm is forecast and then its
the same thing all over again. Then of course there is the other
category of drivers who think they can make it through a Canadian
winter using their 'all season' radials. Problem here is that sometimes
they can, but they are also the first vehicles to be sideways in the
ditch, causing massive traffic backups because they couldn't make it up
some small hill on their way into work some slippery morning, and the
coastal areas do get lots of black ice. The thing about west coast snow
is, it immediately turns to hard white ice the instant it is driven on
or even simply walked on. And of course, no matter what tires drivers
are using, and no matter where in this country they are driving, they
all seem to suffer from the same insanity, the need to get there
sooner, go faster, and get past the vehicle in front, no matter what
the driving conditions. Perhaps we should stop interfering with
Nature's attempt to clean out the gene pool and just leave them where
they are, upside down in the ditch.
Now it seems to me, as I change the subject, that I had indicated I
might tell you about the sound system Ryan was helping me put together,
so, I guess I will. Firstly, I do need to restate the fact that there
is no real need for this elaborate toy (although its certainly not a
toy), its just that I figured it would be fun to have, and a good tool
for facilitating the improvement of some of my skills. Its similar to
what I have said about having my high-end guitar.... owning a high-end
guitar does not make one a better guitar player. What it does is make
one play guitar more, and by playing more there is the possibility of
becoming a better player should one strive in that direction. Ooo,
how's that for waxing philosophical? Anyway, I had told Ryan that I was
interested in a small, inexpensive PA. Something I could use to
practice singing though a mic in order to improve my enunciation and
voice control. I would therefore also have said item should it be
needed as a PA for whatever reason. I showed him some examples of
inexpensive and therefore 'cheap' systems available through my favorite
music store. He immediately pointed out the limitations of those
systems. I then figured the way to go would be to put together a system
by purchasing the mixer, speakers, etc separately, and could he advise
along the way. Turns out all the lower-end analog mixers have
limitations that I'd have never thought of as well as mechanical moving
parts (all the control knobs and sliders) that will get noisy or
inoperative from use, lack of use, and age. Bummer. It wasn't helping
that I was thinking in terms of a 'kite' while he thinks in terms of
the space shuttle, but then he certainly knows a tiny bit more about
these things than all of the rest of us put together.
He suggested I look at the digital mixers. I'd never heard of such a
thing but thats what the big, incredibly expensive ones are these days.
There are also small ones available for small bands and individuals and
people just like me, units that are capable of doing things that us
normal people could never even dream of, with features most of us would
never use if we did dream of them. Turns out there are all sorts of
input and output path routings, effects, sends, gates, EQ's and so on
built into these units at the software level, features that simply
don't exist in an analog unit, at least to the same degree. And here's
the kicker, there are no moving parts with the exception of the on/off
switch. They are basically solid state computers that you plug mics,
instruments and line-level devices into. If you've been paying any
attention at all to what you are reading you are now asking yourself
“how are they controlled”? No knobs or anything to push or turn or set.
Well, they are controlled from either a laptop or a device like an
iPad. They are Networked, either by an RJ5 cable or WiFi. The units
become their own network server, you select it and log onto its network
and open the dedicated mixer app available from the maker's web site.
Obviously when setting up your network you password protect it, and
away you go.
So, after researching analog and digital units just to satisfy myself
that this was taking me in the right direction, and combinations of
speakers etc I ended up going with a tiny little digital mixer, the one
he suggested. Interestingly, the best place to get it was through my
favorite music store, same place I got my guitar. I also picked up a
mic stand and cabling from them because everything I already have is
actually borrowed from Ryan. For now I'm going with a single 'main'
speaker, but its one that while small, puts out 1000wts and has a bunch
of controls on the back that I haven't a clue what they do and
apparently don't and probably won't actually ever need. When I brought
the mixer home, I obviously opened the box and unpacked it. Thats as
far as I could go because I didn't have a clue as to what to do with
it. I had been playing with the software app in order to get
familiarized but could only go so far before being totally stumped. At
first opportunity, Ryan did a basic setup and we ran through the
functions and the 'whats' and 'how' of running it. Setup was simple for
him as he knows this stuff, not so simple for me because for me its a
whole new approach to sound mixing, but using it once its been set up
is a breeze. It all works and is really cool. Very portable, easy to
get everything hooked up running. When you want to change a setting,
you simply tap the appropriate spot on the controller screen. When you
shut down, all your current settings are retained for next time, they
are stored in the unit, not on the iPad or laptop. Oh, get this,
several controllers can be logged in at the same time, meaning I can
have my iPad beside me as I play while someone could be listening and
making fine adjustments to fit the location or situation, assuming they
have the app and the password. Again, cool. And pretty well all thats
left to do to get this system to where I want it is have Ryan fine tune
and adjust a few EQ setting and FXs. After that, the only thing to ever
have to do will be to adjust volumes as required. Again, cool.
doug
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THE ONTARION REPORT
Hello everyone!
It’s time once again to continue our trip!
Last week I concluded the visit to Buckingham Palace and I hope you all
enjoyed it. This week I’m going to take you through a less detailed few
days of our time in London. I’m sure you’ve all heard of the most
famous sights of this famous city so I’m going to give you less
personal details and more facts about each site we took in.
The second day of our London was spent visiting The Tower Of London.
It’s another facet of the buildings created by the Royalty that’s
dominated London for hundreds of years. This fortress was built for the
purpose of protecting the city from invaders and was also created to
house the Crown Jewels of the King or Queen that ruled during each
Royal Reign. The Tower of London is located on the south bank of the
Thames River and is a very prominent stone fortress. There are still
actual military guards that do just that they guard the tower and all
of its contents. These guards are known as Beefeaters and were so named
because they were looked upon by the reigning monarch as necessary for
the protection of London and the Royals and to make sure that they
remained strong and healthy in case of invasion, they were fed the best
beef in all of England! Beef was determined at the time to be the
healthiest way of eating if one were to be subjected to arduous tasks
such as fighting off enemies of the Crown! Today the Beefeaters are
retired military members and although still officially members of the
Royal Guard, they do not carry weapons. I’m sure if necessary, they
could still defend the Tower they are mostly part of the historical
tourism adventure but when we saw and talked to several of these men,
we took note that they are all still in admirable physical condition
and not to be fooled with!
The tower once and for many years was the storage home for the military
weapons and armor of the military guard of England. Nowadays the mass
of rifles and military paraphernalia have been removed from The Tower
and were moved under orders from former Prime Minister Tony Blair to a
smaller museum in another smaller city 100 miles north of London and
the Beefeater that told us this fact was not impressed! He is of the
opinion that such historical and important hardware still belongs in
the Tower Of London. He said that Tony Blair was trying to spread the
tourism attractions throughout England and figured that London wouldn’t
miss the military weaponry.
The Beefeater told us that PM Blair was absolutely wrong and that the
idea of spreading such history around has backfired on him and the
museum now housing the weapons is not successful in the least. The city
of Leeds is not much of an attraction to tourists and that every
tourist this fellow encounters at The Tower asks, “Where have all the
weapons gone?” I guess I’m not the only visitor that missed seeing the
military strength that was for hundreds of years an important part of
one of England’s best and most interesting tourist attractions. Maybe
some day the Prime Minister of the day will see the light and return
the weapons to The Tower of London. The one feature that The Tower
still has is the presence of the Ravens that inhabit The Tower. It is
said, “If the Ravens ever leave The Tower of London, England will fall!
Maybe that’s why we noticed that many of the Ravens were caged in wire
cages in The Tower! LOL! There are still however, many Ravens that fly
freely about the inside of the Tower.
That’s about all I have for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!
Bye for now … Greg
PS: Something To Think About>
I’m sure that the Queen’s Throne in “The Throne Room” is very important
but I heard tell that she favors the one that’s just 20 steps from her
“Royal Bed” and has a picture of Burt Reynolds on the backside of the
door!
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Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.
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