The Squamidian Report – Aug. 30 / 14
Online Version
Issue #640
Including:
The Ontarion
Hi All,
This is kind of funny, or strange, or different or something, we have a
salamander living in our garage. I've known about it all summer because
I've seen it a few time. It took me a while to figure out how it could
be making a living in a dry concrete garage but then I realized it was
living on bugs. You know, all those little bug things that you find in
the corners and under stuff in your garage, assuming you have a garage.
Or, you'd find them in your basement if you have one of those. But,
salamanders need water and I could not figure out where it would be
getting any. Our garage is usually pretty dry, not a lot of available
water to be had. Then, one day, we had pulled in with the car and were
standing there talking when all of a sudden the little guy came
scooting out from under the stuff that is under the work bench and
headed straight for under the car where the condensation from the A/C
was dripping down and leaving a temporary puddle on the floor. Mystery
solved. The enterprising little critter had figured out where to get
its water. At any time it could leave the garage as the door does not
seal all that well but it never seems to want to leave. Its got a good
gig going. Enough food that is probably fairly easy to find and catch,
and an apparently renewable source of clean drinking water. It will be
interesting to see what it does when winter gets near.
And speaking of critters, Willow has a new hobby. Or perhaps its just
an extension of her on-going interests. You see, there seems to be a
rodent, rat, squirrel, who knows, living behind the back corner fence.
And Willow is hard wired for rodents. Their presence over-rides
anything else going on in her brain. She has spent hours sitting there,
staring and concentrating far beyond her normal level. Every once in a
while she shoves her nose under and sniffs so hard you'd think she was
going to actually vacuum the critter or critters right into her
nostrils. When she finally comes in to the house her eyes are almost
wild with excitement and she's panting so hard you'd think shes about
to hyperventilate. One evening she was so excited she could hardly
finish her dinner and by the time she finally came in at bed time, she
was so exhausted she could hardly make it up the stairs.
She had a whole day of uninterrupted rodent patrol last Wednesday when
'The Wife' and I took off on the bike for a nice day-ride. We had a
neighbor look in on her, let her out and feed her. We caught the ferry
over to the Sunshine Coast and rode up as far as the highway goes,
where you'd catch the next ferry if you needed to keep going, and then
took some side roads as we worked our way back to Gibson's. While there
are a couple of towns and 80k or so of paved road on the Sunshine
Coast, which is actually mainland, there is no road access. The only
way to get there is by air or by boat. The 'feel' of the area is
similar to the east side of Vancouver Island and very different from
this area because those areas have a vastly different geological
origin. Weather was great, in fact, we are starting to get tired of hot
sunshine. Good thing this weekend has cooled down and a few showers
have wandered in. The riding was good, relaxed and enjoyable but there
was one frustration, the usual one, BC Ferries. The ferry back to
Horseshoe Bay was running an hour late for both directions and that
meant everyone waiting was frustrated. To make it more frustrating,
unlike the Horseshoe Bay side, there are no amenities at all at the
Langdale terminal. Just a big parking lot and a few porta-potties.
However, once back over, our ride up the Sound in the late evening
twilight was very nice. And Willow just wanted back out to further
harass the rodents once we were home.
*
The verdict is in, CD's work. I had been having
problems with birds damaging my blueberries for years. Just as the
berries would get ripe, a stupid bird would peck a hole in it assumably
after the seeds and leave the rest of the berry on the ground. As
mentioned a few weeks ago, I tried covering the plants with netting but
the netting did more damage to the plants than the birds did. Anyway, a
neighbor suggested hanging old CD's on the bushes. Apparently the birds
don't like the reflecting light as the CD's dangle. Well guess what,
that works. I hung one CD from the last plant to still be yielding
berries, a late producing variety. The rest of my blueberry crop is
over with for this year. The birds have left those berries alone. I'd
been loosing them just as they ripened and now I've got berries again.
Picked a whole bowl full the other day. Bummer, back to eating too much
ice cream.
And, guess what?? we will be picking up Uncle Russel at the train
station this coming Thursday. He will be visiting for 4 days or so, so
he can see the 'Squamidian' world and do several trips up the gondola
etc. Might have trouble getting him to leave once he has had the
pleasure of experienced that place, but that would be ok too. Then, on
the following Tuesday, both he and 'The Wife' will be flying out on the
same Westjet flight to KW. Doesn't get much more convenient than that.
I don't usually do a 'thought for the day', but here is one I like to
live by.... If you have only one tissue, but your glasses need cleaning
and your nose needs blowing, clean your glasses first.
doug
****
****
THE ONTARION REPORT
Hello everyone!
I’m just sitting here hoping that my computer will finally connect to
the Internet so I can send out this week’s Ontarion. I’ve got that
funny little spinning multi coloured wheel going round and round in
place of my cursor and it’s bugging my anal orifice to no end! Guess
I’ll have to place a call to my personal computer whiz and see if he
can tell me how to get out of this predicament! No problem writing my
column but when I’m all finished, how do I get back on line to send the
end result to Doug? Gotta figure my way out of this mess within the
hour or I’m sunk! I remember the days when I knew absolutely nothing
about computers or how to use one and this takes me right back to
square one when something like this happens. The message I get when I
try to open my server or whatever you call it is “You are not connected
to the Internet!” My answer to that statement is “No kidding!” tell me
something I don’t know! To which, what goes through my mind at that
point is “You don’t know how to get this darned computer back on the
Internet!” LOL! Hahahahaaa…… Thanks, is all I can say!
While thinking about the modernization of the communications systems
used in the world today, sometimes I long for the good old days when we
had one phone in the house and it was connected to an actual physical
phone line that was strung to our house from a wooden pole that stood
out front on the boulevard. If the kids were playing on the street and
happened to hit the wires on that pole with a football they were
tossing back and forth and someone was using the phone at the time, the
clarity would turn to a loud crackling sound until the wires stopped
shaking. I remember my dad would yell at the kids to take their
football somewhere else! LOL! It was always more fun to play on the
street than in the open field at the end of our street because it was
great laughs to know that hitting the wires annoyed the heck out of
whoever lived in the house that the wire connected to! I remember in
particular we had about four home owners on the street that liked to
yell at us kids for playing in front of their houses but we just
figured when they yelled at us, “Too Bad Mr Johnson, our dads own as
much of this street as you do so you can’t tell us to play somewhere
else!” Of course our dads would sometimes be the ones to yell at us too!
The phones back in the 50’s and early 60’s were cool, in the early days
of my youth, our phone number was 88028, then it was changed to 58028
and then they decided that we should be referring to each number with
the prefix of the area we were in. Our area prefix was “Sherwood” so
our phone was labeled with a white circle in the center of the dial
with SH 58028. Then, the phone company decided a few years later that
we should be dialing the corresponding numbers to SH before each phone
number we dialed when calling out to someone. So, our number became
74-58028. It stayed that way for many years until there were so many
phones in the modern world that it became necessary to add more numbers
to each phone dialed. Consequently, we had to start dialing the area
code when we wanted to call someone outside our area. That wasn’t too
much to ask when calling a different area but now they’ve changed it
again to be that every time we phone someone these days, we have to
dial the area code three digit number in front of the seven digit phone
number every time we call someone even if they are in our same area.
It’s getting to be more of pain with every change but I guess that’s
progress! They told us that computerization would simplify things in
every way, including making phone calls. I guess the only way phoning
someone is simpler these days is when you have their number saved in
your phones memory chip so you only have to hit one button to have the
phone dial their number for you. Of course, you still have to remember
how to program your phone to do this little feet and then you have to
remember how to find the one button required to call each person. Of
course all the people whose numbers you have saved on your phones
memory chip are listed on an alphabetical phone book within the memory
of your phone. So you just have to remember how to access that phone
book list when you want to call someone on your list. So you see, the
age of computerization is making things so much simpler after all,
isn’t it?
I still haven’t taken to owning a cell phone and I find that makes
things so much less complicated! After all, if someone wants to talk to
me when I’m out and about, they’ll just have to phone my home number
and leave a message. I’ll call them back when I get home and retrieve
the message from my “answering machine” or is it “Voice Mail” ?????????
Awe who cares anyway! I’ll call them back if they leave me a message
and if they can’t be bothered leaving me a message, their call couldn’t
have been that darned important after all, could it?
That’s it for this week folks!
Thanks for tuning in and I’ll look forward to talking to you all again next week in The Ontarion Report!
Bye for now … Greg
PS: Something To Think About>
When you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water! When the human body is dehydrated, it’s thirst mechanism shuts off!
****
Have a good one..
the doug
The Fine Print!
The articles in these issues are the sole property of the persons writing them and should be respected as such.
|