The Squamidian
Report – June 12 / 04
For the ‘ON LINE’ version of this newsletter, go to:
http://www.members.shaw.ca/doug_b2/report.htm
Also in
this issue:
Howard
The Ontarion
Hi All,
As some of you
know, Sue is in Ontario for a few days. I drove her to the airport last Sunday.
She usually parks at Park & Fly but whenever the opportunity arises, I like
to drive her in. That way I can see her off. It also means I have to pick her
up but I’ve cleared that with my boss so I should have no problem getting off
the day she flies back.
The drive in was
it’s usual spectacular scenic self. Traffic was fine as it was kind of off peak
times. The drive back was the pits. Tourist traffic all over the place.
Granville was bumper to bumper and there was a stalled buss blocking a lane.
Then there was an accident on the approach to the Lions Gate Bridge. That
snarled things a bit. And then just past Lions Bay there was a tour buss broken
down. He had managed to limp onto the painted median of a bridge so at least
traffic could get by on both sides. Welcome to summer.
*
We did a really
stupid thing. Because I’m a bit lazy and because I hate painting we made the
mistake of letting College Pro Painters into the house. Big mistake. Big, big
mistake. First off, Sue waited around a whole day for them to show up. They
finally dropped in but were not prepared to get started. They were supposed to
start that morning at 8 am.
There was
supposed to be a crew of 3 but when they turned up to paint there was only 1.
He worked very fast and very sloppily. I had to make him fix up a lot of
‘errors’. I had to tell him that whole walls were included in the contract and
that there were outside sections as well. I had to stop him from leaning our
aluminum ladder (which they borrowed because they forgot their own) against the
interior walls as it was making big black marks. I ended up leaving a message
on the head guy’s answering machine that contained language that I don’t
normally use. By the time the painting was done with we were fed up and
frustrated. And they left the empty paint cans and mess behind.
This whole thing
was in stark contrast to having Hidden Valley painted several years ago. At
that time we had hired a very competent and professional, family friend to do
the work.
Where’s that
Brian Wiens guy when you need him?
*
This has been a
very exhausting week. I’ve been getting up at 4:30 to get ready for work and be
at that job site in Whistler by 6:30. Then we work a 10.5-hour day with no
breaks. The people that own machines that cost 300 grand expect them to be
billable for the whole day. We shut down at 5, so that puts me home about 6 pm.
By the time I take Yogi to the river and munch down some supper I’m ready to
turn in.
****
Hi
Doug, this is my Dad's contribution to this weeks report. Sus
Dear Editor,
I have read
Lorne's first installment in his series of reminiscences with interest and
anguish and so I must correct his memory on one point. It is on the scandalous
affair with the chicken. Since some people will read this as oral sex and since
Russel has the reputation of an honorable gentleman of high moral standards and
holds a high office in the Masonic Lodge, I must clear my conscience and
declare it was not Russel, but I. There is no Statute of Limitation on crimes
of sex and I realize the danger to my liberty and reputation (such as it is) in
admitting to be a principle in this scandalous accusation. I did not have sex
with that chicken; publish and be damned.
Sus
note.....Howard is second to the throne in this questionable family, Russel is
third so it is likely that Howard's memory is the correct one.
doug note…One still has to wonder, was Howard pondering that age old question, ‘do chickens have lips?’
****
THE ONTERION
REPORT
JUNE 12, 2004
Well, here we are
again and it’s another sunny day in KW.
The world is watching to see if Reagan’s
funeral will attract a terrorist act. Bush is still the brunt of “buffoon”
jokes and criticism about the war in Iraq and we here in Canada are busy
considering the impending Federal Election. I say we’re in for another round of
lies from every politician involved. We’ve got a prevaricator for a Premier,
why would we expect anything else for a Prime Minister? Our former Prime
Minister says he knew nothing about the missing millions during his
government’s time in office. I say we should be checking the financial records
of the past 11 years they were in power as well. I’d be willing to bet that
there are other major discrepancies in their financial dealings from those
years too. I personally think it’s time to let a different party take the
reigns. Hell, they can’t be any worse than what we’ve had, can they? Well,
maybe when I think back to the days of the NDP in Ontario and BC one could make
a case for worse governing than the Liberals. However, the Liberals have had
their chance to put Canada on a steady course and have made a mess of it so why
not give the other guys a kick at the cat! What ever happened to the Rhinoceros
party? Maybe they’d be interested in leading the country out of the jungle this
time? I guess we’ll just have to do our duties and VOTE because if you do not
exercise your right to do so, you have no right to complain in my book.
Enough political
horse pucky!
This week I spent 3 days or the better
part of them helping my cousin with a home improvement project. He is a retired
OPP officer and lives 2 blocks down the street from me in the identical house.
We’ve been best friends since we were kids and still do lot’s together. He
asked me to help him install “French Doors” on his living room doorway. He’s
intending to turn the room into a theatre. I decided to give him a hand since
he’s almost completely useless when it comes to doing carpentry work. We made a
list of materials that we’d need and headed off to the local Home Depot. After
a couple of hours, we were home again with the goods. Of course I have all the
tools needed to do the job and he has only a lowly 1970’s ¼” Black and Decker
drill. Consequently we had to drag all my tools back and forth between the two
houses during the project. This also meant dragging the doors back and forth to
make a couple of cuts on my table saw. I have a full workshop in the basement
and really didn’t mind doing this work for Randy. We were in my workshop
discussing what cuts needed to be done to the doors. I had the door on the saw
and was about to make the first cut when he said stop. He was wondering if I
had the saw set correctly so I shut the saw down to make the measurement one
more time. While he was explaining his thoughts to me he calmly started to
lower his hand onto the saw with the blade still spinning. Just as he was about
to make contact with the blade I yelled a warning and luckily he just nicked
the top of one knuckle. A mere scratch to what it would have been if I hadn’t
caught his action. He was lucky he didn’t lose a finger. I reminded him of his
inexperience with power tools and from that time on he stayed well back and let
the “pro” do the work.
Well,
after much running back and forth we were ready to hang the doors yesterday. Of
course I had chucked cheap shots at him all week about his “saw incident” and
he was humble enough to take it without much retaliation. I had made it through
the whole project without so much as a scratch, lucky me! As I exited my Jeep
with a cordless drill that I needed to make the 1” hole for the latch set, I
inadvertently stabbed myself in the left forearm with the point of the spade
bit! OUCH!!!!!
Damn that
hurt! I figured since it only went in about 3/8 of an inch and wasn’t bleeding
I wouldn’t say anything to Randy. I was happily working on the latch set when
he appeared in front of me with a wet cloth and a band aid. I said “what’s that
for” and he said “well, the band aid is for the hole in your arm and the cloth
is to wipe up the blood on my hardwood floor”! Curses, foiled again! At that
point I had to admit what had happened and take a couple of cheap shots myself
about how careless I’d been with the drill. I guess it was only fair! Anyway,
once the first aid was completed we finished mounting the latch and to our
amazement the doors fit like they were supposed to and he now has a closed in
“theatre”.
Our next project is to install a power
roof vent in both my house and his to remove the heat buildup from the attic.
It should be interesting when we have to climb on the roof of each house to do
this one! I don’t think Randy’s ever been more than three rungs up a step ladder
but I told him he’ll have to be right up there with me if he wants my help with
this project. He says he’s not afraid of heights but we’ll see! He was the only
police officer that I know of that faints at the sight of blood! I was amazed
that he was able to deal with my stab wound without passing out. Hopefully the
roof vent project will go smoothly and without injury. I’ll keep you posted on
this one for sure.
I’d better sign off for this week. Thanks everyone
for tuning in. I’ll talk to you all again on the 19th. Have a great
week!
GREG.
PS: Something to Think About>
Statistics prove folks who drive like crazy are!
PS: Congratulations to Tara and Anton on the new
baby!
****
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the doug
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